Saturday, March 10, 2018

God's way vs. mine

I used to be terribly impatient. I wanted “what I wanted.” “how I wanted,” “when I wanted!” That state of mind never made me happy. The angels reminded me frequently that it was an affirmation of fear, not faith.

I learned this the hard way after I wrote my first book. I sent out numerous query letters and and got an equal number of rejections. I got upset. That wasn’t what I was creating! I was creating getting my book published! I sent more letters, and received more rejections.

The angels suggested that I write one of the publishers and ask why they rejected me. The answer was enlightening. They said the book looked good but that I didn’t have enough experience in my field to have the large audience they required to ensure a profit. That answer shaped my future.

I sat back and started to re-evaluate what I wanted. Did I really want to be a famous author? Why did I want to get a book published? What was underneath all this? I realized that part of me wanted to “prove” to family and former friends that quitting engineering was a good decision and that I could succeed as an author. I threw that reason away. It was ego-based and would never give me true satisfaction.

I kept digging inside myself, and found a deeper, more authentic desire. I wanted to share the angel wisdom and tools that had made my life happier, better, and more free. I didn’t care if became famous. That was something I’d seen as a means to an end. "How do you reach people? Get famous.” I realized I didn’t really want to spend time promoting a book or doing tours. I just wanted to share information. I knew I could start that right away.

I did readings and taught classes. I envisioned having online education five years before YouTube existed and over a decade before home live streaming was a viable technology. I gave up the “how” and “when” for my future dreams, and focused on a happy now. Doors started opening.

Many of you know the rest. I ended up self-publishing with a company that bore my dog’s nickname! I ended up speaking at conferences with famous authors. I ended up meeting the live-streamers for Braco, who were just starting their “spiritual-netflix-type site online.

They contacted me, gave me the freedom to design my online “Ann & the Angels” series as I wanted, film it on my own schedule, and allowed me to price it lower than anyone else would permit me. Similar online programs cost $300 each. Mine costs $60 per 12 episodes. I wanted to offer high quality information at an extremely affordable rate, and they did too! The "Braco dream team" ended up being a a dream team for me. It wasn't over. Later, Karl – CEO of –  urged me to gaze online, and volunteered to livestream me, propelling me further into a life I could not have imagined.

It was when I finally gave up my fears, doubts, and insistence on having life go “my way” on “my schedule,”that all my dreams started coming true – of course, better than my way and on a perfectly Divine Schedule.

Thank God for the gift of time which allows us to grow, clarify our desires, and attract better than what we'd create on our own.

Here are a few pointers to help you let go of the “my way or the highway” mentality so you can have better than what you want, on a Divine Schedule of course!

1. Clarify your real desires

Make sure you are creating what you really want, deep down, not what you think you "have to have," to get what you really want!

Consider this real life example:

A student of mine (who ended up being an incredible manifester!) wanted money. What she really want was to pay off a 90K student loan debt. She wanted that so she could feel secure, so she could feel free to buy things for the family like a house and vacations, and to stop feeling like a failure for having so much debt.

She started to focus on the debt without shame, seeing it as just another bill. She imagined having the freedom to get a house, go on vacation, etc. She started to enjoy the freedoms she already had, and focused on what already made her feel secure.

Within a year, miracles showed up, doors and pathways opened, and the 90K debt was nearly all paid off. She manifested a house after that, vacations, and more. She focused on what the money would bring her, not the money itself.

If you focus on the "means" to and end, the soul does not get excited. It gets excited about the real goal.

Dig deep. Ask yourself, “Why do I want what I want?” Keep asking until you find the bottom line.

2. Give yourself the feeling now

Beneath everything you want is a feeling. If you didn’t think having something would make you feel better, you wouldn’t want it. If you want money, to buy something, or pay off debt, how will that make you feel? Secure, abundant, expansive, free?

Find the feelings. Then ask, “How can I bring that feeling into my life now, if only in small ways?” 

3. Trust Everything

When you are manifesting, you have to trust that everything that come up is part of your manifestation. If you don’t get what you want, there is something better. If something doesn’t happen when you think it should there is more divine timing. Everything is in divine order.

A client's trial was postponed and he was deeply disappointed. A large company tried to steal the income they contractually promised him. He needed the money and was anticipating the upcoming trial. Later he found out the original judge wasn't favorable. The unwanted delay gave him a judge that ruled in his favor and changed the course of his life.

When I’m manifesting I tell myself often, “Trust Everything!” 

When impatience, doubt, fear, or resignation hit and you start to think your dreams won’t happen, refocus, do the simple steps above and get back on the right wavelength.  Choose to be happy now and you'll be creating an even better later!

Remind yourself, "The best "high" way isn't always my way!"

Saturday, March 03, 2018

Love fear till it disappears

Parts of this story are pretty crazy. Sometimes my adventures in other dimensions are a bit "out there." I try to stick to more normal topics most of the time, but every now and then I share one of these otherworldly adventures in the hopes it helps us all understand this world a bit better. Enjoy...

Years ago I read Don Miguel Ruiz's book, "The Four Agreements." In the book he speaks of "the parasite." I read it, decided it made sense, and forgot about it entirely. It wasn't until a few years ago when a powerful, jealous and angry soul aimed the powers of hell at me, that I came to understand quite clearly that fear is a parasitic energy. As well, it is the food that feeds a parasitic vibration – one that is more literal and real than I ever imagined when I read the book years ago.

Happily, I also came to know the invincible power of love to dissipate fear and free us entirely from the influence of this parasitic vibration –  both within and without.

Some of you have heard this so I'll be brief. A powerful soul got jealous of one of my friendships. Storms hit my house, knocked down my trees and leaked into my roof. I had nails appear in my car tires, huge dust storms in my path. Two of my favorite trails caught on fire the day I'd been planning to hike them. I started to having very nasty and unkind dreams from which I'd awaken because scary looking beings were on me sucking my energy and creating pin-like sensations into my skin.  For all my faith in God, I wavered. I was frightened. I did what I always do when I'm scared. I got strong, held it together, and focused on service. 

By day I was fine. When I was helping others I was fearless. But then at night, when I let fear creep in the relentless energies that feed off it continued to attack me with an unceasing barrage of gripping static and unloving thoughts.

I prayed for help. The angels, bound by their commitment to the creator to honor our free will had to let me choose fear or love. Apparently my words were saying, "Help!" but my fear was saying, "I don't believe you can!" They did all they could. They taught me. The amplified my light. At one point they told me about the abuse the angry one suffered as a child. Suddenly I felt compassion for a soul so hurt that they'd hate me, and I even felt compassion for the parasitic vibration they had aimed at me. How sad to be so disconnected from love.

Now that I wasn't scared, I wanted to understand more. Here's where it gets weird. One night I felt the static-y unpleasant vibration around me and decided to engage in a dialog with the parasite. Imagine me, sitting there with my eyes closed, telepathically having a discussion with a creature that looked more like it belonged in a sci fi movie than in another dimension in my bedroom! Before I began the inner dialogue, I connected with the light within. Suddenly the being in front of me no longer felt "static-y."Instead it felt extremely impersonal.

Me: "Why do you inspire and amplify our fears?
Parasite: "We need energy to live. You humans generate a great deal of excess energy when in fear. We use that to survive."

Suddenly, I got an entire download. These were a race of beings that evolved technologically but lost their connection with their hearts. They lost their emotional connection with one another. They became disconnected from any experience of love. Because they no longer felt love, they no longer felt their connection with the Source of life. They had evolved into a parasitic race. They were neither good not evil as we label it. In fact they were quite neutral. They just wanted to survive.

Me: "Why don't you stir up love? It is a much stronger vibration than fear! Thousands times more so! You'd feel much better!" 
I was surprised by my vehemence in the face of a vibration that had terrorized me for so long. I actually cared.

Parasite: "Do you know how hard it is to stir up love on your planet? Most humans need an object to feel love. Fear is easy to generate. You simply introduce or amplify a thought they already believe in." 
That took my breath away. They weren't being diabolical, evil, snide, or sarcastic in their answer. They were being clinical. They reminded me of sharks who create chaos in a swarm of fish to feed. They, like the sharks, were survivors. I thought to myself, perhaps like those sharks who surrender to being "hugged" by loving divers, these beings someday would remember what love feels like.

Some switch in me flipped. I was no longer simply unafraid. I felt a strong powerful love. Archangel Michael was merging with me and using this opportunity to speak through my mind directly to them. 
"Some day if you have a wish to reconnect with the Source of life you can find a way to do so by amplifying the higher vibrations of humanity, and by selflessly attempting to send higher vibrational energies to those in the lower vibrations. Because you have forgotten how to love, it is only in your selfless intent to serve rather than take, that will you draw forth the energy that you seek from the Source. IF you insist on continuing to stir up and amplify fear, you cannot last. Humanity is evolving and your food source is dwindling. You will pass into oblivion as the masses become aware of you and cease to feed you with their fears. They will nourish instead your higher selves with their love and prayers, and your lower vibrational understanding of self will disappear."

Michael backed out of my body and I stood there quivering with the force of his loving electrical power still running through me. I felt the angels profound wish for all beings to reconnect with love. The parasite simply, wordlessly, and neutrally left. 

While most of you will never have to deal with such crazy otherworldly dimensions, they do mirror what goes on inside of all of us. Just as fear provides an energy source for those disconnected vibrations, Fear gives us a high. It was originally intended to do so – so that the body would have a surge of energy to fight of flight when faced with danger.

It was never meant to become our drug of choice.

Like a drug, we get a temporary high from our fears as the cortisol course through our bloodstream. Like a drug it distracts us from facing our feelings of being disconnected or powerless. Like a drug it brings us up and then makes us crash. Like a drug, fear subtly undermines our well being.

Happily the addiction to false fear is one we can overcome with something easily accessible to all... Love. 

Here are some pointers this week to help you "Love your fears till they disappear."

1. When you are afraid, identify and love the fearful part within.
Ask yourself, "Who inside of me is afraid?" You might see, sense, or intuitively know what part of your soul is living in fear. This may be you at a younger age, an aspect of your soul from another life, or you may even perceive a symbolic representation of the fearful part of you.

For example if you see your mother, that doesn't mean your mother is causing your fear. It means that some part of you adopted your mother's fears. If this happens, ask again, "Who inside of me is afraid?" until you see, sense, or know the part of you that believed in these fears.

You might see, sense, or intuit something else - a dog, an ice cube, you name it. We've seen everything in my office. Trust what you perceive.

You are connecting with an energetic part of you - a piece of your soul that, like a scared child, needs love.
2. Love and comfort the fearful part of yourself

Imagine what this part of you looks like. Trust what comes. Or if you are not visual, imagine your eyes are closed but they're standing in front of you. Ask this part of your soul why it is afraid and what it needs.

Imagine giving him or her a hug. Wrap your arms around yourself if you like. Ask this beautiful piece of your soul if they'd be willing to go into the light where they never have to feel fear again. Tell them you and the angels will handle your life and they can rest.
Here is where you get creative. If a child says, I'm afraid if I speak up I won't be loved, you might ask that part if it wants to go into the light where everyone will love what they have to say. Imagine you are their parent. Tell them you want to hear what they have to say but they have to go into the light where they'll be safe. Imagine them going into the light with the angels.

Let's do another example: Suppose you lost a job and you're afraid you won't find a new one. While this might seem very human, you want to get rid of the fear. Your soul knows intuitively that the Divine will guide you to a better job, but something inside you is still scared. You go within and ask, "Who is afraid I won't get a new job? Who is afraid everything I love will be taken away, and I'll be broke, poor, and alone?" Perhaps you'll see a young child who had to move and lost all their friends. Perhaps you'll see a past life where you were homeless. Maybe you'll see an image of your father who always worried about money and represents the part of you that does the same."

Comfort that part of you. Imagine you are their parent. Tell them it will be OK, that God is in charge, that you don't know how things will work out but that you're loved beyond what you can imagine and that angels are helping you. Ask that part if they are willing to go into the light where they'll have everything they want and need and never have to worry about money again. Guide them into the light in your imagination.

If you treat the scared parts inside of you with the love you'd show a scared child, they will calm down, dissolve into light and integrate into your higher awareness. 

Sometimes you need to lighten up before you can do this exercise

Go onto YouTube and search for "laughing babies," "laughter yoga," or your favorite comedian. Watch a funny movie. Play an upbeat song that you love to dance to. When the brain becomes distracted, fear loosens its grip. It is much easier to love the fears away after we've used a little loving distraction.

You can even use your own sense of humor, if you can connect with it. When I feel afraid, sometimes I joke, "I'm going nuclear! I imagine the light of my love exploding outward from my heart chakra burning away all darkness its path."

Laughter is a very high vibration and quickly helps to dissolve fear. I've seen the angels use it many times in readings before working with the deeper parts of self.

3. If you need additional help seek it out – You deserve it.

I once had such irrational fears come up that I couldn't find the source myself. Instead, I got a past life regression hypnosis with Robin Miller (the amazing musician who plays at my seminars is also a certified hypnotherapist!). In two hours the fears were simply gone and never returned. 

There are all sorts of healing modalities out there designed to help reprogram the brain and therefore release the trauma that feed the fears.  Search to find one that resonates with you.

While it seems all too easy to get sucked into fear, the truth is your love is more powerful. By loving the fearful parts inside of us we heal them.

Free from fear, we once again enjoy guidance and miracles by aiming our powerful loving thoughts towards the joyous realities that we wish to create.