Saturday, March 25, 2017

You never failed love

I was sitting in silence the other day over breakfast when the angels started talking. "The world thinks the notion that you're not good enough is beneath every problem. That is not the deepest fear however."

"Beneath the illusion of not being 'good enough' almost every human heart has a deep-seated unconscious feeling that they have failed love or failed God."
 I felt a lump form in my throat and tears rise up from somewhere deep within. "Say more," I asked them. "You cannot fail that from which you are made. You all know this. But deep down, almost every human being – you included –  feels that at some point in their existence, in this life or others, they have failed God, failed Love, failed... This is why you are on earth – to realize you are One with Love."

I let their words sit within me, feeling the truth of them, but not quite seeing where I thought I had failed love. I've examined this lifetime in great detail and have forgiven myself for anything less than loving that I've seen. Still, the feelings that came up indicated there was more.

It happened to be the week Amma Karunamayi was in town giving blessings. She is known as an embodiment of the Divine Mother in India and she is the closest thing to Jesus I have met in human form. Her love and compassion are boundless. You get to write down "blessing requests" and then she reads them and gives you energy to assist. I wrote down a request to stand in my light, and to be able to share Divine love with others. Inwardly I asked to see myself through God's eyes.

She touched me, looked deep into my soul with compassion and shut her eyes. The loving power I know as God flooded through her being and blasted me in the kindest way, burning off lifetimes of misunderstanding. Suddenly I saw the misunderstandings and feeling of undeserved guilt I'd carried from past lifetimes. I saw lifetimes in which I wanted so badly to help people, but became disillusioned with their lack of willingness to help themselves. I saw lives where I gave up and got killed due to arguing in public rather than silently remaining loving. I saw lifetimes where I abandoned spirituality and tried to manipulate my way through life. I saw lifetimes where my dreams turned to dust. In each of these, I felt the feeling of failing God, failing love, and failing myself.

These lives flashed before my eyes, until I was propelled into a vision above them all, where I saw myself through God's eyes. I've been here before. All I saw was love –  pure blinding unconditional love. All I felt was compassion for this "small self" –  the woman who wanted so desperately to be loving but found it too difficult to maintain in some lifetimes. I felt the exquisite tenderness of the source beckoning me home as I journeyed through the eternal matrix of Divine mind, seeking only myself. In this love, I was instantly home again, bearing witness to the perfection beneath all things.

I heard the angels say once again, "You cannot fail that from which you are made..."

It never fails that in weeks following a mystical experience I receive tangible validation in my life. I recently paid a person to make my newsletter more responsive on mobile phones. I thought it would be a good idea to help more people read it easily. It didn't turn out that way! It worked on phones but didn't look as well on as many devices as the old one. I had to go back to the original format.

Angels being angels, they didn't miss a chance to show me the divine coordination in the universe... "See Ann, you don't have to be responsive to everyone and everything in life. The Original You is Enough! You cannot fail that which you are." Giggles. No matter how long I teach, there will always be deeper levels to learn!

Here are a few pointers to help you embrace the fact that you have never failed love....

1. Every night, think of three things you're proud of that day
These can be great or small. Maybe you had one kind thought about yourself, held the door for someone who had their arms full, felt compassion for anoather soul, made a loving dinner, prayed for a stranger. Anything loving counts.

Many of us were subtly trained to focus on what we did wrong, rather than what we did right. If you give yourself credit for the good that you do, it will be easier to embrace the fact that you are nothing less than love inside!

2. Now think of something you're less than proud of and see how you were trying to love

Maybe you got angry at someone. Deep down you were trying to love yourself. Maybe you "messed up" and forgot to do something you promised. You were perhaps trying to do something that mattered more and had just over committed. Maybe you said something you regret. Perhaps you were trying to protect a fragile heart.

While there are always more elegant and loving ways to express love, the desire to love and be loved lives beneath all thoughts, words, and deeds... no matter how far removed they seem from it. 

3. Look in your own eyes in the mirror and say, "I am pure love having a human experience."

Statements of truth help to remind and awaken the soul. Use them frequently until something deep within awakens and you feel the magnificence of your being.

I love you all. You are enough. You have never failed. 

The sticks, the thorns, the leaves, the rain... none of those have failed the rose. They have only shaped and guided its blossoming.

Saturday, March 11, 2017

Gladly I will jump

This has been the year I’m challenging myself to “Try something new.”When a thought doesn't make me happy, I remind myself to "try something new." For example, earlier in the year when I created a health challenge, I caught myself saying, "How many more times do I have to do this to learn!" The thought didn't make me happy so I changed it. "Thank God I've learned and I'm done with this!" I could feel my energy rising immediately and my entire body relaxed.

I caught myself one week, dipping into a very, very old whine, "No one cares about me," and immediately changed it to a better thought, "Life loves me!" I got the sweetest outpouring of thank you notes and kindnesses shown to me within days!

I've been challenging myself to give up old stuff in the house that is past its prime and treat myself to upgrades. I've been trying new foods that appeal, new books... and it has been fun! 

Change breathes fresh air into our minds, hearts, homes, bodies, souls, and lives. But it isn't always easy. I may want new towels, but giving up my old ones was like giving away old comfy friends! I may want new thoughts but giving up my old ones requires some willpower and dedication. I may want to try new foods but that meant I have to branch out a bit and risk a little failure here and there. Change requires letting go. 

I was pondering the joy of being like a child and "trying something new” on Monday, while making hard boiled eggs for snacking this week. They're really yummy with a drizzle of olive oil, a dab of Dijon & Dill, and a sprinkle of Hawaiian black salt!

Back to the point, the eggs were cooked and I was carefully dumping them into a strainer in the sink, trying not to crack them prematurely, when I heard the most delightful voice in my head…

“See how gladly the eggs jump out of the pot, releasing themselves from the boiling water, joyous about being cracked open and released unto their new life!”

The language was quaint but the message was clear and beautiful! The angel in my head was reaffirming my desire to release old patterns, habits, etc… to leave the "shells" that had both protected and confined! Sweet!

See how gladly we can leap from situations that are behind us, and no longer work. See how gladly we can release the shells of our old past programming and release ourselves into delicious new thoughts, new circumstances, and new life. See how gladly was can embrace change! 

I felt the familiar angelic warmth embrace me and radiate from my heart with an exquisite tenderness. To the angels every single moment is new, never before experienced, and never to be seen again. Change is exciting, an opportunity for a new experience, a new joy!

I smiled, thinking of all I wish to create this lifetime, all I wish to experience, and all the change that will required. Gladly, in God’s time – just like those eggs – I will jump!

Here are a few tips to help you "gladly jump" this week... 

1. Pay attention to your loving desires
When you feel a desire in the moment to do something, say something loving, or try something that appeals and feels wholesome (because your guidance is always loving), say it, do it, try it.

Pick up the phone and call that person you are thinking about. Write the email. Sign up for a class. Get outside and take a walk. Take a ten minute nap. Look at that new career online. Go up to that stranger and compliment them! (You know you want to!) Get the food that sounds appealing and healthy. Politely bow out of a conversation that is annoying or boring you.

I rarely call clients because I have a wonderful assistant, but once I had an urge so strong to call a particular person that it was positively urgent. I picked up the phone and dialed... and interrupted a suicide in progress. This person is still alive today due to that guidance.  

When you feel something that sounds loving, wholesome, appealing… say it, do it, try it. Trust. The heart has its reasons.

2. Use Your Mind, but Don’t Let it Rule You

Sometimes we’re disconnected from our hearts. We’ve ignored them for so long we can’t hear our true desires. Instead you hear secondary desires that don't really satisfy.

For example, say you’ve ignored your desire to eat food that nurtures you for so long that you are now low on energy. Now your body wants sugar, carbs, and things your mind already knows from past experience don’t feel so good. Thank the mind for reminding you. Now sit quietly and ask your heart… Heart what does my body really want right now? You’ll get the answer.

Suppose you have ignored your need for joy. You meet someone. Your heart really wants this person to be “it” because you're lonely. The mind tells you, “You’re seeing red flags, things that aren’t right. Be careful.” Thank your mind for pointing out the warning signs. Next, ask your heart, “What do I want in life for my own joy? What do I want in relationship.” Listen. Then use the mind to see if your true desires are being met in this current situation or not. Be honest with yourself. Ask your heart, “What next?”

Your mind is a useful tool for analyzing current situations against knowledge, past experience, and desired outcomes. Used correctly, it can inform you and let you know whether or not something is in alignment with your heart. 

3. Every now and then have a little “heart time”

In this age of so much information, we all need a little time to get back in touch with our hearts. We know when we’re disconnected. We feel stressed, tired, angry, upset, ill, etc. At these times it is important to spend some quiet time alone.

Journal, ponder, walk in nature, listen to beautiful music. Ask your heart, “What do you need? Where am I listening? Where am I ignoring you? Given my desires, what next?”

Have a beautiful week listening to your beautiful hearts, and may you “Gladly jump” when the time is right for delightful change! 

Saturday, March 04, 2017

Which heart to follow?

I was in need of a refill by this Monday. It seems that the week prior, people were bombarded with challenges, angry energies aimed at them, inner turmoils resurfacing, etc. It was a pretty exciting week in the energy! Because I often get 100+ emails a day, I get to bear witness to the patterns in human consciousness. I do so with love, and I'm honest when I cannot, but after all these years, I know how important it is to maintain my own energy.

So Monday, after working all weekend on projects I'm passionate about, I awakened with my head trying to convince me that I absolutely needed to hunker down and handle a very full day of work. My heart, however, would have none of it. I needed to get outdoors. My heart won.

I spent two hours two hours hiking in the cold windy desert, without a soul around. Nature and the energy warmed me. I got to sit and just "be" in the arms of the mountains, with the earth firm beneath me and the sky allowing me to expand into its infinite blue. I heard my angels, got insights for future teachings and felt my body come alive with the pure and vast energy of nature. At one point some sweet guide in my head told me to leave... "Make haste or you will be rained upon!" I smiled and "made haste" before the rain came!

Needless to say, everything else got done... and more.

People are so afraid that if they listen to their hearts, their lives will fall apart. I have witnessed just the opposite. You get recalibrated. Life starts to work. You are happy, energized, and fulfilled. Cooperative interactions arise. You feel connected... to self, life, and others.

The heart was meant to guide you in your life and the brilliant computer of a mind was meant to help you figure out how! 
My to do list is "ta done" and I've got time even to help a friend... unanticipated by my mind, but perfectly orchestrated by my heart!"

Here are a few tips to listen to your heart this week...

1. Find time to listen
You cannot hear your own heart if you don't take time to do something you enjoy. It doesn't have to be meditation. It can be anything that gets you in the present and happy. Cook, walk your dog, spend time with loved ones, anything works as long as you a) enjoy it, and b) it draws all your attention into the present while you are doing it

2. Acknowledge everything you feel / even if you don't act on it

Sometimes as we are getting reacquainted with our heart, we hear the heart of the hurting child within as well. "I just want to quit my job!" the child's heart says impetuously, or "I just want this person to go away and leave me alone!
The adult heart says, more honestly, "I want to quit my job and find something fulfilling in a graceful easy way, without financial hardship." "I would like help bringing peace into my heart over this relationship. Either end it gracefully or transform it please." Both hearts live inside of you. One is just a little more emotionally mature!

Your "adult heart" will be the one that wants an elegant, not an impetuous, solution. It is your true heart of hearts, that wants solutions to not only the immediate problems, but one that fit beautifully in all areas of your life. You may not know how to fulfill these hearts desires, but that's OK. Just acknowledging them is the first step.

3. Act upon the desires of the heart that feel inspiring and joyful.

If you are too afraid to act, or not yet ready to trust, or if you don't know how you can... pray to be shown the way.

In my case, it was easy to set aside office work and take a hike. 
When I wanted to quit my job in engineering, however, I still needed income. I prayed to know, beyond a shadow of doubt, the most graceful, perfect time to quit, given all my various needs. Three years passed. I grew tremendously. The, finally, one day I clearly heard voices telling me to turn in my resignation. Even though I didn't know how I'd make a living, by that time I had grown in faith, created enough savings for some time off, and was emotionally ready.

The heart is your "tuner" to the Divine, your access to angels, and the compass which points you to your inner wisdom. It tells you exactly where you need to be to grow in faith, trust, and a greater love for all – including you!