Saturday, April 30, 2016

Joy is not a waste of time

Last week on my show we did a little exercise called "Finding Your True Colors." When I was making up the series, and the angels gave it to me, I went to bed frustrated. I thought it was too silly to include in the show. "Trust," they told me. "Try it tomorrow." So I did the exercise the following morning.. and sure enough, I discovered a lot about myself that I'd forgotten.

I've struggled all along the way creating this show! I love living the material, dreaming it up, and filming it. I love seeing how it changes viewers lives! But oh, what a task it has been to structure the material! Taking years of my life and coalescing it into 90 pages of notes has felt like such incredible work," and I've not enjoyed that part. In doing the angels' exercise I was reminded how much I love creative expression. So I shifted my perspective and looked at structuring the classes as something creative. Lo and behold, it became a joy.

The revelations didn't stop there. I remembered how much I missed playing with my art supplies! I started an art journal where I am currently doing watercolors and marker art, suited at best, for a kindergärtner. I don't care if it's "good" or not, the colors give me great joy! It is engaging a part of me that went dormant, and all of the sudden ideas are starting to flow in all areas of life.

I remembered, also through this exercise how desperately I need be out in nature. I began hiking again... Such joy! I almost gave up the day I planned to hike because the skies were threatening rain, but instead I decided I'd bring my own sunshine! The clouds parted and I enjoyed a glorious day in the forest.

We are indeed filled with so many beautiful and diverse sides to our personality. I'm extremely busy and can easily make all sorts of excuses about why I must ignore some of these, and yet I know that when I feed these diverse parts of myself weekly doses of joy, no matter how small, then all sides of my soul become stronger.

I exercised this morning and suddenly sat down and wrote two newsletters before I'd even had time to shower. Spending energy on something that uplifts you creates more. Spending time on something that gives you joy, inspires and enlivens you. These things are not duties, nor are they a waste of time. The things that give you joy are never a waste of time! They are instead, food for your soul!

Saturday, April 23, 2016

Just ask...

I joke that I'm a former "control freak." I used to tell God how everything had to come into my life. Years ago when I had recently left my career, the only long-term relationship I'd ever have, and a home I loved. I was needy! I wanted comfort, validation, and to feel better about myself. Instead of asking for those things, which the universe could have brought me in a million kinder ways, I insisted on having a man come into my life to "make me" feel those things. I became a magnet for men who were needy, who wanted me to comfort, validate, and make them feel better about themselves. These were perfect vibrational matches, but seriously painful lessons.

Now when I want comfort I ask for comfort. Just last night I was tired and wanted a hug. So I sat and asked... in the past this has come in various ways... strangers hugging me, friends stopping by, sudden bursts of joy as the energy embraced me. Last night, I had no sooner asked, when I felt the embrace of the Christ energy surround me with such exquisite tenderness it was beyond any human description.

Likewise, I don't ask for money when I want or need something. Instead I ask for what I want or need and trust that the highly creative universe can provide it in a variety of ways, most of which are beyond my imagination! I've known people who needed a very specific piece of equipment for their business, and found it in a brown bag by the side of the road! Last year, after attempting all year to look at new portable computers, and being distracted each time, my portable died. I was so busy, my prayer was simple, "Dear God, you know what I need, figure it out, thank you." Within days, dear souls told me they were getting rid of their old portable in lieu of a new one and asked me if I'd like the old one. My jaw dropped and I nearly cried with gratitude. The model they gave me was better than what I'd ask for.

Days before a seminar in Sedona last year, I tried on my white pants and discovered they didn't fit! I did not have time to shop. "Dear God I need a new pair of white pants that fits. I must find it nearby, and it can't cost too much... or guide me to something else to wear! Thank you!" Within hours a nearby thrift store popped into my head. Five minutes from home, I found a brand new pair of white pants in my size that fit perfectly. They were $7.99 and 20% off with my coupon :)

This is how the Divine works! So this week when you want something, be it a situation, a feeling, or a thing, just ask. Stop trying to figure out what you need to have to get it, how you need to get it, whether or not you can have it, whether or not you're worthy of it, etc. Put all that aside and like an innocent child, ask for what you want or need, expect it will come in the perfect way, and like that child... enter the kingdom of heaven!

Saturday, April 16, 2016

A knock on the head

The angels have been working with me a lot on the subject of committing to my own desires. As a result the manifestations are coming quickly. A few weeks ago, I wanted a piece of equipment to ensure I could continue serving in a way I enjoy. The angels told me to commit to having it in an affordable way. I did. The urge to look Online hit the next day, and there I found one used but in mint condition! I bought it on faith with money I had set aside for something else. My tax return came the the very next day and apparently I didn't owe as much as I thought. I saved the exact amount I needed!

Last Monday I was cleaning house and thinking about other things I'm manifesting. As I was reaching to dust the top shelf of a very high bookshelf, I had a moment of wavering in my commitment – just a single doubt. At that VERY instant, a heavy crystal sphere, rolled off the bookshelf, along with its glass holder, and fell on my forehead, right above my eye. My head felt as if it has been shattered with a hammer. Lights were flashing in my vision, and my stomach felt insanely sick. I knew I had just given myself a concussion. "I got it!" I told the universe. "I get the message! No more doubt! Ow!!! I didn't do this. I'm erasing its effects. I've learned. Help! Ow!!!!"

Dear God, this was as bad as the proverbial, two-by-four that we joke we need to get a point!

Lesson learned, I knew it was imperative not to beat myself up. I grabbed some ice and sat down to pray. The angels came in quickly. "Sit still. Do NOT move." They were serious. I felt them all around me. After awhile the sick feeling subsided and the flashing lights stopped, but even the smallest move felt like jackhammer was pounding in my head, a painful lightning storm was going off in my brain. Suddenly they spoke again. "Go to the mirror and gaze at yourself now!" So, with an ice pack and a towel looking like a terry cloth turban, I gazed. My eye barely peeked out from underneath the wrapping. I had a moment wondering if the energy could turn on when I was in so much pain but I was quickly reminded that Pain is the illusion, Love is the truth.

Suddenly the energy turned itself on. I felt a river of soothing heat flowing through me. I felt the hammering electrical storm subside. "Sit now, Ann. Watch something soothing, and keep icing," the angels were still talking to me very constantly, but a bit more gently now. I turned on Braco videos, propped myself up and sat very still. Without reason, I focused on the fact that I would have no bruising at all. I still hurt. I still had quite a lump on my head, but something in me was convinced, or rather committed to the fact that I would not bruise. I had no doubts. I felt the Love that wanted me to feel good.

The angels advised me to sleep sitting up that night, and to wake myself up every two hours just to keep the electrical signals going in my brain. By the middle of the night, although the area was still horribly sensitive, I knew it was over. I wouldn't bruise. I would have a little pain for a short while, but the lesson was learned, and no terrible damage was done!

It made a great story for the introductions before gazing on camera the next day!

Would I have gazed even if I had bruised? Yes. I was committed. Somehow that commitment to stand in a light and love greater than any pain helped me heal from what could have been a real problem. I am giving thanks once again...

So every time you waver in thinking you can have your dreams, remember me and my big knock on the head and remind yourself that you don't need such dramatic reminders! There is a love so much bigger than we can even imagine. And it wants you to live an amazing, healthy, happy life. Say yes... and let your every thought reflect a faith in that truth.

Saturday, April 09, 2016

Don't guarantee disappointment

I was at a little cafe the other day. A beautiful woman with two children in a stroller was near the counter looking at the options in case of beverages. She was reading the ingredients and clearly not yet ready to order. So the clerk took my order and filled it while the woman was still deciding. I was leaving when I noticed the woman looking indignant, but saying nothing. In only a matter of minutes, because no one at the counter read her mind and figured out she was ready, she stormed out the door loudly declaring, "I guess nobody wants my business!"

I felt compassion for her because she was clearly exhausted and had given so much in her life to her kids and others that she was empty. Even though I had nothing to do with this I decided to show her a bit of kindness. "Excuse me," I ran after her. "I didn't mean to have them take my order first. I didn't know you were ready to order." "I wasn't when you ordered!" she snapped. "May I buy you something," I asked, knowing she desperately was in need of love. Tears started to show up in her eyes. "No, no, It wasn't your fault!" she said and ran off, without a drink, without accepting love, with only her own pain, anger, and upset. It was sad.

Had she simply said to the clerk, "I'm ready to order," it would have been no big deal. Had she allowed me to show her a bit of kindness, she would have had what she wanted plus love and a free beverage. But she clearly felt unloved, unappreciated, and unnoticed, and her own internal pain became a self fulfilling prophecy.

We do that. We sometimes expect disappointment so thoroughly that we don't ask for what we want. We don't say "Yes" to our own hearts because to do so would required trusting in ourselves enough to know we have the power to create something magnificent in cooperation with the Divine. We don't always believe in the goodness of the universe and its ability to help us so we feel rejected, ignored, and discarded.

In my younger days, I complained to the angels that I felt like a "disposable" human being. I gave and gave and no one gave back. I was expecting sympathy, perhaps an award for my martyrdom, and at least a compassionate acknowledgment of my pain from the angels! Instead I got truth! "When do you ask for what you want, Ann? You are always praying for others, putting yourself last. You don't even ask human beings for help." Ow. True. As the saying goes, the Truth does set us free. I stopped martyring myself and instead gave only when it was a joy. I started asking for help or consideration when I wanted it. My relationships became much more fulfilling and more honest.

The angels once said that most of us "would rather guarantee disappointment, than risk success." So this week, take the angel challenge. Drop into your heart and see if there's something in there that you really want - a situation, a thing, a person, a trip, whatever it is. Just ask your heart... "Show me what I truly desire." Maybe you already know. Then say, "Yes, I do want that. Dear Divine love, dear angels, clear my blocks, and when you're ready, show me the next step." If you get nothing, there's nothing to do yet. If you get something then do it. You will know when you get guidance. It'll be clear and easy to understand. If not just enjoy your life... and trust. You've given the universe permission to love you!

According to the angels, "We never leave you. But if you don't leave you, we can love you even more!"

Saturday, April 02, 2016

Bliss of oneness

Ever since filming Series 7 of Ann & the Angels I feel as if I'm "Alice in Wonderland." I walk around and suddenly connect with the Love that lives in all of us. I feel my heart expand, the energy start to flow and the most exquisite feeling of connection with the heavens and the earth. It is not a steady state just yet. It happens "randomly" although I don't really believe in chance. A client sits down with a heavy heart, and this Love "turns on" and starts to flow to them. I'm waiting in line at the grocery store, and it "turns on." It has its own intelligence and timing and I love not being in charge. This is the energy I surrender to when I gaze. Even that seems to have deepened. In truth, the angels say, the love does not "turn on." It is always there. There are just moments where both myself and another are open to it, and suddenly we begin to feel its flow. Like an invisible river running through all of creation it silently waits for us to acknowledge its Presence.

More and more, I am starting to feel this love look through my eyes at others with wonder. There "I AM!" And there. And there "I AM" again... It feels like a beautiful Presence of which I'm (Ann is) just a small expression. Its playful, childlike, joyous, and sometimes rather humorous. Even looking at grumpy people in the airport on the way back from filming, I saw them with a childlike sense of amusement and compassion. "There I AM again... just not aware yet!" Itis hard to put into words, but I'm trying...

Gazing last week was a much deeper experience too. Rivers of love flowed through me. I can't think in that space. I just feel my heart expanding beyond words, and I lose any sense of being in a body. I feel like a field of awareness that wants to reach out and reveal itself to everyone tapping in. It feels as if we share a secret... I am you. You are me. We are different expressions of the One Love. It is so beautiful.

And while I know it is not everyone's calling to feel this way, you can always take time in the day to sit and surrender to the Love that creates us, or to the angels' Love, for in truth they are expressions of the same. Just sit, breathe, and intend to receive. Your intention alone, sincerely expressed, will open you to have this beautiful energy flow into your body, your home, your life, and beyond that to your dear ones. Such a simple thing to do, and yet perhaps the most powerful intention we can have... "I receive love." In truth, we ARE love, but the human self, can say it intends to receive ... and thus receive an awareness of that which has always been there.

I tend to talk about to more "practical" matters in most newsletters, but every now and then I am overwhelmed with the desire to share the other realities I experience. When my life is off kilter, I go back to receiving or sharing love. When I need something I don't know how to achieve, I go back to receiving or sharing love. When I want to help someone else, I receive and share love and intend for it to flow downstream to them. When I first started channeling healing energy years ago, I was taught to just be open – not to direct it, but to be open and trust it. That still applies, whether I'm doing readings, gazing, or living my life.

It is my dearest wish for all on this planet to know and feel this magnificent love that is our constant source of Being – not the warm fuzzy feeling of human love, but rather an expansive energy that fills the heart and extends into all creation, that accepts everything within you, makes everything look perfect, and reminds you that you are so, so much more than this body.

Sit, breathe, and receive after reading this... Focus on your heart and see what you feel. I'm surrendering to this love and praying you feel its bliss.