Saturday, December 27, 2014

A year of amazing grace

As I look back on this year I am in awe of how much has transpired. I’ve faced some of my deepest fears and emerged with the ability to channel love so strong is sometimes takes away other’s fears and pains. I’ve gone from not having a clue how to be in front of a camera to managing it in extremely challenging conditions. It has been a year of challenges, growth, but in the end, a year in which I feel the love that breathes life into all of us, more strongly than ever before. I am so grateful for life.

I am humbled when I hear from others who are connecting with the heavens and creating miracles in their own lives as a result of the show I've been doing. Although we're only a few weeks into the manifesting series, one very dear soul wrote to say someone had unexpectedly paid off $6000 in back taxes to save her house… as a gift of generosity. Another wonderful angel wrote to happily share her story of finding designer clothes, in her size for a price so low she couldn’t even find one item for that in a store. People have been telling me they are experiencing their angels' love, assistance, and humor on a regular basis. Every little bit of growth and challenge I've been through is worthwhile when I see how this work is helping others. There is purpose to every moment of our lives.

In 2015 it will be imperative to keep making loving choices. Those who do, will find their streams of grace and miraculous assistance. Those who embrace struggle as an expected way of life will find that amplified. The energy is more intense than ever before. So, we must believe in the love that made this amazing universe and made us all. We are ligthworkers - souls who chose to come to earth, to believe in love and in a kinder and happier way of being. It isn’t always easy, but we have the Creator's love within us and the angels at our sides.

My wish for all of you in 2015 is to feel loved and cherished; to know the incredible power of the Source that lives and breathes life within you. May all your dreams come true, and even better, may you experience all the beauty and wonder that God dreams for you.

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Abiding in light

Merry Christmas week to those who celebrate. Happy Hanukkah! And happy holiday season to all of you. It is one of my favorite times of year, a time when people seem to love a little more, open up a little more to feel whatever they are feeling, and certainly allow me to share a little more love as well.

It is easy to share love with the loving. It is easy when life looks as we wish, when people behave as we wish, when things go as we wish. It is easy to feel love amidst beauty and harmony. We are encouraged to do so at every opportunity, because when we practice finding and feeling love in those easier spaces, we can more easily in the darkness.

This week, in the midst of holiday joy, wonderful clients, and baking, I discovered that, for the fourth time this year, a credit card of mine was hacked and used fraudulently. Thankfully the angels always guide me to discover these things before they get out of hand, and I am not charged. However, I had to resist the very human urge to wish that the criminal's computers would crash beyond repair the minute they attempted to steal from me!

Instead I sent them a dose of light and love so strong that their darkness could penetrate my soul, nor steal my joy. They will either leave me alone or deal with the growth such light will inspire in the human spirit. I give them back to God.

While sending love might not stop others from abiding in darkness, it helps us avoid giving away our power, our God given joy, and the experience of connection with the Creator. There will always be demons on this earth - lost souls who do not feel connected to the source and therefore need to bully, manipulate, and steal. Yet, we need not let them jar us from our light. They just don't know who they are. We do.

We can be the light in the darkness. We can prevent others from stealing our God given right to experience and abide in this love. We can be the lamp that never goes out. We have the power to choose to abide in a loving experience or not. No one else can steal that from us. Our Presence is ours and ours alone. The light that abides in our hearts is our Present to the world.

Join me if you like, in creating a little gift for yourself this week. Surround someone who has been less than loving to you with light, and no intent other than "God help them grow into a greater truth." How does it feel? You just birthed the light in humble darkness once again.

Saturday, December 13, 2014

Not just a body

I recently caught a little bug guy staring at his own reflection on the window. I bet he doesn’t sit and say to himself, “Am I too green? Why do I look like a leaf? My legs are too skinny. My nose is too big!" He’s just looking at his own reflection with wonder. “Who is that? What is that?” The answer of course is the same no matter who or what form we look at... all forms are a manifestation of God's love. Some know it more than others. The more I identify with this light, the happier my body becomes.

As many of you reading this newsletter know, I have had more than my share of physical lessons over the years. When my spirit does not get my attention easily, eventually my body will! A broken foot and ripped tendon years ago taught me to slow down, take care of myself more, and live in greater balance. Parasites taught me where and when I was allowing other energies to usurp my own knowing and feeling. Twisted intestines showed me when I stuffed my fears and feelings years ago and now remind me to be extra kind to my body. As a result of these lessons I've had a lot of practice identifying with myself as a soul in a body, rather than looking at the body and thinking "that's me!"

I first remember doing this in high school. My first job was at a local fast food restaurant. I remember looking in the mirror and feeling what I perceived to be the indignity of being a 16 year old girl wearing rust brown colored polyester pants, glasses, braces, rubber bands across her teeth and a nice big button that said, "Hi! I'm a Big Mac Builder!" I remember the day I decided I was not going to win friends with my looks, and so, as shy as I was, I decided I would have to use my personality! I remembering just making a decision that I would act outgoing and friendly, no matter how uncomfortable that was. To my surprise and delight, the other kids responded as if I really was!

I recently thanked God that I have learned to identify with my soul more than my body, when I had to film the current "Ann & the Angels" series, looking like a walrus from the waist down! I had a twisted ileocecal valve the night before, and using everything I was about to teach, I managed a miraculous healing! By early morning I was untwisted, out of pain and ready to go! There was only one minor detail. I was still seriously larger than usual, and the only pants I fit into were the yoga shorts I brought in case I wanted to exercise!

So there I was, in the studio, in front of a professional camera, in yoga shorts and nice tops! It became a joke before each episode that they had to "film above the bloat line!" I had to meet new guys who were helping film, and as well a few old friends who dropped by while I was looking my not-so-finest!

In the past I would have been mortified, but after years of working with angels, I truly know I'm a soul in a body. Furthermore, my soul had things to care about and share that were far more important than vanity or an uncomfortable appearance! So next time you start to criticize your appearance think of me looking like a little walrus in front of that camera and remind yourself, "I am a soul! I am light! I am love! No matter what I look like, feel like, or am experiencing, that is the reality of who I am"! Then let your light shine no matter how you feel you look! Let your love radiate outward from you. THAT is what is beautiful!

The other day I was gazing for a dear young client, channeling God's love in a big way. She surrendered to the love coming through my eyes and into her being, and suddenly she started seeing us both as big, bright lights until at long last she even saw through my light body to the door behind us… a little excursion into dimensions beyond the solid one. Something like that changes you - you can no longer pretend that this physical form is all we are.

So, as you look yourself in the mirror today, bring love into the observation. Look into your eyes until you see the light of your soul burning brightly within them. It may take awhile to stop the self-criticisms that so many of us have adopted by habit, but when your mind is finally silent, you can look at yourself with the wonder and awe of a child beholding someone without a shred of judgment. Then you will see or feel that light and know this is what you truly are. You are all so beautiful - love shaped in billions of different forms!

Saturday, December 06, 2014

Decorated with love

I love the holidays. I love the cooking, the decorating, the presents, all of it. But I do have to watch myself. There is a tendency to want to think I'm Martha Stewart, Norman Rockwell, and Annta Claus all rolled into one. If I am not careful I get so caught up in what I want to do that I forget to enjoy what I am doing. The past few years have been different however. I've slowed down, focused more on what I authentically feel like doing and have enjoyed the holidays even more.

Somehow even after getting home from one incredible healing adventure in California, and getting to work full time I was inspired during my next office day to decorate. It used to be an ordeal. I have a lot of boxes to lift, and a lot of things to put up. This year I focused only on the moment at hand. I focused on decorating being an act of loving my home. And in less than a day, even taking time out to get my work done, and chat with viewers on my show, everything was up and in place... without any struggle or drama whatsoever, and done with incredible love and gratitude.

Friends and I are also getting more present and real about where we are at this year. We broke with tradition for our Thanksgiving dinner, changed the menu and made dishes that are much healthier and were still incredibly delicious. It was a very relaxed and lovely feast and we all felt wonderful.

So as you move forward through the holidays, enjoy them. Enjoy the festivities or don't do them. Enjoy writing your cards or don't send them. Enjoy your gatherings or don't go to them. You can't possibly "do it all," and yet, so what! you can do what you do with love. I've made peace with not being Martha, Norman, and Annta Claus all at once :) I'm satisfied with being just plain Ann, and enjoying the precious moments of time I have been given. Somehow in that reality, more gets done, and in the most beautiful of ways.

Saturday, November 29, 2014

Love even when you disappoint

One of the hardest things I had to learn about love, angel-style, is that it doesn't mean I will please everyone else. Over and over the angels worked with me to see how throughout my life I had tried to make everyone else happy whether or not that meant sacrificing my own well-being, finances, balance, etc. Like many of us, I learned, not so much in words, but through cultural programming, that love was what we feel for one another and what we do for one another.

Love, according to the angels is so much more - an acknoweldgement from the Divine light within me that the Divine light exists within me and all souls – no matter how I am feeling or acting, and no matter how they are feeling or acting.

The angels say love is a state of being in which all things are allowed to be who they are. That's not so easy when something you need conflicts with something someone else needs. This is usually where we drop into the adrenal fight or flight response - defending our right to be, or withdrawning timidly from the situation. Although those responses are conditioned, neither is necessary. We can learn to be kind and loving as well as honest with each other at much deeper levels. I never lied, or so I thought, but in truth I was not always deeply honest with myself and therefore everyone else in my life. I used to have a terrible time expressing my own heart if it meant disappointing someone else.

The angels taught me that we can risk disappointing another if we have the trust that God has a bigger plan that includes taking care of everyone...even if we are not the instrument of that care at the time. While that sounds easy, given our programming it isn't always.

Last week a dear family member asked me if he could pay me to redo his website. I able technically able to do these things. But quite honestly I'm max'ed out in terms of what else I can add to my life and still stay in balance. So in spite of a desire to help and the ability to do so, I had to kindly decline. Athough I know this person still loves me, I know it was disappointing for them. But I had to maintain my own personal integrity and well being. I know this dear one will end up using one of the referrals he has and will end up with a beautiful website. I also know that someone else who can use the work will receive it. And I will maintain balance in life. So was this love... to have to disappoint someone I care about? The angels would say yes, because it was kind, honest, and without any defense or flight whatsoever.

When you find yourself in a challenging situation in which you might have to disappoint another, start by being honest with yourself. Then with love and compassion, without fight or flight, be honest with the other person. It is then their choice to love you still or not... you have already done your job and found that fine line between loving yourself, and loving the other. We all have a right to "be" exactly as we are. We all have a right to want what we want... and when we are honest our interactions become more clear, honest, and loving as well.

I hope you all had a beautiuful Thanksgiving. I am thankful for all of you :)

Saturday, November 22, 2014

Manifesting my miracle

I've been through a journey this past week unlike anything before. As I filmed the next Series of "Ann & the Angels" I was forced to practice everything I preach at deeper levels than ever before. The results in my life and my heart are exquisitely beautiful in spite of the depth and challenge of the lesson..

I got on the flight to California, feeling wonderful in my body and excited in my heart. I got off an hour later with a twisted ileocecal valve (twisted intestines), bloated like a walrus, and in excruciating pain. I've had this condition a few times ever since fear triggered it in 2012 when a neighbor's house caught on fire, and some challenges in a friendship triggered it again a year later. The one time I went to a clinic, they told me it was life threatening and wanted me to rush to the Emergency room. I declined and healed it on my own.

Ever since then I've had to be more careful with what I eat. Apparently something I ate did not agree. In any case, I barely made it to the hotel. I called the film team and told them I was not sure if I'd be able to film the next day. They agreed to visualize healing with me and we all decided to wait and see how things went. I tried not to panic, called a friend who offered me some human comfort, and started to pray.

I faced my worst fears that night in the hotel room - of being alone and in unbearable pain. I was in a city I did not know, with no healers I knew, no medicines, no natural remedies, and in a pain so strong I could barely breathe. Spasms of pain went through me in waves, each one worst than the last. I had no car, and no way of knowing how long the problem would last. In the past it has been four or five days before I felt any relief at all, and at least a few weeks before I could eat normally.

In the midst of my prayers, I realized I was about to film a show on manifesting and creating miracles - a show in which I share that when "you don't know how, God does." Clearly it was time to practice everything I was going to preach. I had asked to manifest perfect health. Now was my chance.

I focused on being in the studio the next morning. Fears assaulted me non-stop for the first few hours, but every time one came up, I imagined breathing light into it and gave it to God. I had fears of not healing, not being able to film, not being able to fly home, messing up my show entirely, fears of having to go to the ER and pay for it forever, fears of never being completely well again, not being able to bear the pain, disappointing everyone I wanted to serve... I was besieged by a barrage of lies, but one by one by one, I sent them away.

I faced lifetimes worth of illusion - lifetimes when I was tortured, lifetimes when I was left alone to die... The sensations were as real as if that were the case, but I kept affirming truth, "God is with me. God is in me. There is no separation between me and perfect health. I am not and cannot be alone because love lives and abides in me and breathes life into me."

After a few hours of this "dance with internal demons," the fears calmed. I was able to focus more clearly on the desired outcome. I imagined filming happily. I recalled what feeling good felt like. I breathed slowly and deeply, and invited all the healers in spirit and the angels to help me. WIth each painful spasm I breathed more deeply, surrendering to it, as if I was in labor trying to embrace the contractions. I completely surrendered my will to God's. "Thy will be done." If God wanted me to film I would. If not I would not. I started to feel that blissful peaceof mind that comes with totally trusting in a greater Love.

When at long last, I was completely peaceful in spite of the pain, I looked in my own eyes in the mirror until I could see the light of God within them, affirming from the depths of my heart, "This light is the truth. This light is the truth of my being. No matter what I see in front of me, no matter what I feel, God's perfection lives within me." I became deeply silent, deeply present, and looked at that light in my eyes until I felt it moving through my body, beginning to heal me.

By 5am the next morning, in spite of being awake and in pain all night, a surge of energy rushed through me and I felt excited, passionate about filming, and knew, in spite of still looking like a walrus from the waist down I could do it. We decided to just do as many episodes as I could even if that meant not getting through the entire series. As I got in front of the camera, something magical started to happen. I felt my love for the material, my love for the viewers, and an overwhelming love and gratitude for the grace of God which had me arrive safely at the other side of my worst nightmare. Suddenly there was nothing but energy and information flowing through.

I filmed five episodes that day and was able to eat normally. The next day I fit in my regular clothes more easily and was able to film five more. By the time we got to day three I was feeling positively euphoric, amazing in my body, and flooded with the grace and love of God flowing through me. I got my miracle healing. I felt washed clear of lifetimes. I can't even describe the sensation of not having fears, that I didn't even know I had before, gripping my body.

And better yet, this series on "Manifesting with the Angels" is now imprinted with the energy that it teaches, imbued in the healing energy of God creating a real miracle for me in my life, even as I filmed. I have no idea what possibilities this will offer the viewers but I feel it is transformational. I may look a little tired and trip over my words a few more times in the first few episodes, but the energy is amazing.

There are times when it is time to face our worst fears - when we get ill, when life falls apart, when someone we love betrays us. In these challenges, when we don't know how to get through the darkness, God does. The angels and the eternal constant Loving Source that breathes life into the universe are there at all times, waiting to bring life and light back into the situation. If we do our part, working with our own minds and hearts to align with truth, and if we surrender to a higher will in these times, absolute miracles are possible God knows how to transform any situation - beautifully, quickly, elegantly, and in a more loving way than we might ever imagine.

I feel alive, connected, and blissful right now as I feel the love of God flowing through my heart. Some big old blockages have been set free, and with them, the light that wants to animate our lives is flowing through mine. I've worked all week, put up the Christmas decorations, and am looking forward to cooking my Thanksgiving dinner with true gratitude and deep love. I cannot wait to see what comes of this... I know it is going to be very, very beautiful.

So, when you don't know how... God does. This week, try remembering this simple truth, in all things great and small.

Saturday, November 15, 2014

What comfort zone?

Comfort Zone? What comfort zone?!! I joke about that all the time. Ever since I left my nice normal life two decades ago I have honestly continued to step beyond my comfort zone. I was terrified of doing readings the first three years I did them! I was not sure I could speak in public and 75 people showed up to my first lecture so I had to focus on serving them rather than my fears! I wasn't positive I could teach anything useful and apparently I can :)

Last year I left my comfort zone again when, after gazing many times with Braco, I started having energy come through me that way as well. I was both delighted and incredibly uncomfortable when people started receiving healings and having transformative experiences. Who was I to channel such energy? But the angels said, "Do it," so I did. I forced myself to tell people in spite of being scared of admitting this was happening, and beautiful things have occurred.

This year I pushed myself even farther and made myself learn "how to look natural" in front of a camera so I could film my "Ann & the Angels" show. It didn't come naturally! I had to practice for days and read everything on the internet I could find. I can't count the number of times I was near panic, having scheduled filming dates in April and realizing that in March I still felt awkward, tongue tied, and fake in front of the lens! I had to grab my mind and silence any negativity. "I can do this!" I kept telling myself. More doubts... "I can do this!"

But there was one thing I was definitely not comfortable with and that was doing a professional photo shoot. My dear friend and client Alba Elena is a magical photographer. She captures the heart, soul, and essence of her subjects. She has been offering to take photos of me for years! I kept putting it off. I wasn't getting enough sleep and had bags under my eyes. I was tired. I didn't have time. I had every reason for not doing it. In truth, I just didn't feel ready. I have pictures of myself all over the place, but most are "selfies" taken into the woods, and it often takes dozens of selfies to get one good one! I am sometimes, accidentally photogenic, but more often, I am not. And while some may argue, I have proof that I won't be sharing in public :)!!


Nonetheless a few weeks ago it felt like the right time. I had a day off. Alba had time and we met in a delightful wooded area with the sun filtering through the fall leaves. This dear angel quickly made me forget we were doing something "serious" and turned the photo shoot into a session suited for two little girls playing out in nature. "Give me that soft gaze energy," she told me. I dropped into my heart, surrendered my consciousness and felt the love starting to flow. Click, I heard the camera, and Alba captured the moment in the photo above. For the first time in my life I saw myself through the eyes of someone who was looking for the magic in my soul, and it was transformative. It has changed the way I see my "external" self.

So when you feel uncomfortable doing something, but want to do it anyway, don't let that stop you. Don't let fear of messing up, or fear of being uncomfortable, or fear of not being able to... prevent you from living your life. Embrace life. Give it a try. The worse you can do is fail... or get a bad picture! And the best? Well you may just start to see yourself a little differently :)

Love you all! Have a blessed week.
Ann

Saturday, November 08, 2014

Miraculous humble moments

Like everyone else, I get caught up sometimes in the need to produce... my website, my newsletters, my Facebook pages, my show... you name it, I always have some project, and usually many in the works. However, the angels constantly remind me that when I suddenly become weary or am not doing my work with love I must either choose to bring love to the situation or put the work down for awhile and do something else that I can love. It is true, in some of the most mundane moments of life, I have felt the most enlightened states of awareness.

Earlier this year I took a break from working on my show to go fold laundry. I was sitting there feeling happy because I had just purchased soft new towels. They were warm out of the dryer. They smelled good, and as I folded them with love suddenly I was overcome by a swirling energy that whirled around me, spiraled in front of me and entered my solar plexus. It expanded within me, warming me and running through me like a river. I ran to the mirror and I was glowing gold, feeling beautiful in my own skin and wondering what on earth, and why on earth this blissful energy chose to enliven me while I was doing something so simple. The angels were funny. "You were present. You were happy. You were in love with the towels." I laughed!! Yes, I was feeling the love at the moment and I was intensely present. At those moments, big beautiful energy is easily embraced.

Just last week I was reminded of the beautiful kaleidoscope tapestry of life and how it is all so rich with love in both the deep dark places and the blissful heights.

I did a reading for a beautiful family who tragically lost their son, and was touched to the core by the depth of their love even in their pain, and the deep desire of their dear one in spirit to connect with them even more meaningfully than he was able to do when alive.

Still raw with their love and pain I sat on the couch after work where I soon felt the warm embrace of my grandfather and my angels. I saw my grandpa smiling at me and burst into tears. It was such beauty to feel the tender and kind touch of spirit after swimming in so many other energies. Ironically his last name, and my original last name is "Nagel"... I joke "angel with two wires crossed!"... I sat there, tears of love streaming down my face, until it dawned on me I had to get up and get the mail. "We'll walk with you," he said to me, and the warmth surrounded me even as I got up and ventured out into the beautiful night.

It is only a block to the mailbox, but with my heart full like this it is a miracle mile of magic and wonder. Chris Spheeris's song "Walk with Me" starte playing in my head as I felt an entourage of angels walking by my side. A grasshopper on the sidewalk looked up at me with wide-eyed wonder under clouds lit like luminescent pearls against the starry night and moonlit sky...

I inhaled the crisp air deeply and inhaled the love that swims and breathes and pulses in every crack and corner of creation and deep within every human heart. Beauty, everywhere, in the simplest spaces in life... in a broken heart, a tender touch, a sweet song, in the eyes of the tiniest creatures, and in the vast night sky. So much life to be grateful for....

This week, embrace the smaller moments, and focus on love when you can. We are meant to have a love affair with life, even in its most meek and humble moments.

Saturday, November 01, 2014

The universe is making love to you

So many of us wait for the "big things" in life before we allow ourselves true joy. When the bills are paid, we'll be happy. When we get a new job. When we find a relationship. When we have "X" in the bank. When our body is healed. When our kids / spouses / parents / coworkers treat us better, or treat themselves better. There are a million reasons for putting off happiness, many of them very socially acceptable and very understandable.

However the angels have taught me a different way to live - to seek happiness in every small moment that we can, and to ask myself, "How can I love myself more right now?" or if I am feeling full and able, "How can I share more love with the world at this very moment?"

I've been working really hard with this Internet show and I love it! However I also know I need to keep in balance so last weekend I scheduled a few days off. I went up to Sedona to see my friend Summer Bacon channel. I visited friends, and I was SO excited to wake up Saturday morning for my annual hike to see the fall color in the forest! I look forward to this day every year, and even more so to the glorious pictures I am able to capture. It is a photographer's paradise!

Life had other plans! I woke up Saturday and it was pouring rain in Sedona. I had a moment of discouragement but quickly shifted my thoughts. I focused on the beauty of the rain and prayed for the weather to clear while enjoying the crisp, damp autumn air. I got in the car while it was still raining, intending as I drove that the skies would clear. Sure enough, as I pulled into the parking lot of the trail, the rain stopped. Even without the sunshine I knew it would be wonderful! I was so excited. Overcast days create a different kind of softer beauty.

Two feet into the hike I turned my camera on and discovered it had suddenly stopped working. No amount of resets worked. The battery was fine. The memory card was fine. The electronics had simply malfunctioned. I started feeling very sad, but suddenly remembered that one of my angels had given me the thought to toss my very old camera into the backpack. It works... sometimes. So even though 3 mega-pixels feels somewhat primitive by today's standards, I decided to be happy that I had a camera that was functioning at least part time! Having released my expectations for a glorious sunny day and a working camera, I was able to enjoy the beauty of the forest that was still dripping dry, and scented with mother nature's perfume of wet pine and moist earth.

More seriously, I pulled my back in early August chopping up a tree that a storm blew over. For ten weeks following, I had little to no feeling in my left hand at best, and most times it was in screaming pain. I had to sleep sitting up so I could stand it for several weeks. And while I channel miracle healings for others I wasn't quite able to find that energy for myself.

Nonetheless, life didn't stop. I focused on every good thing I could focus on, and in those moments when I felt love, I didn't feel pain. When I focused on my clients I didn't feel pain. When I focused on the beauty of nature I didn't feel pain. When I took an 8 mile hike I felt a little but not nearly so much. And miraculously, one day after I decided I was ready for a miracle, I gazed and allowed the energy to run through me like a river, and had the sudden inclination to stretch and twist a certain peculiar way. My back popped back into place, and instantly there was relief!

So even when things aren't right in your life, or when life does not meet your expectations, love is everywhere. There are wonderful things to enjoy in every moment, even when we have to search for them. Why is it a splinter can ruin our day and yet the sunshine and brilliant fall foliage does not fill us with such absolute delight that we remain ecstatic? I think we have been trained to focus on what is not working. As we retrain ourselves to focus on what is beautiful, good, and true, we find the joy that is there all along. We realize that the entire universe is making love to us!... Not in some human sense, but rather in the sense that glorious Life itself offers us its best for the taking.

So while it may not be easy to shift your focus, try it. I think of it as exercising my mind. This week see if you can do your best to acknowledge your feelings first, because we must give love even to those sad and upset parts of ourselves, but then, instead of wallowing in our pain and problems, seek out the silver lining; seek out the good; seek out the simple pleasures.

The scent of a beautiful rose once turned my entire life around during a very dark time. It reminded me of all that was beautiful on this earth. And in that instant, a doorway opened up for God to reach in and work with my heart.

Your portal to love might be a cup of coffee, a sunset, a smile on a child, a dog, the feel of grass under your feet, dark chocolate, a delicious pumpkin soup, the chill in the air... love is everywhere. Consciously allow yourself to slow down and enjoy life's pleasures this week, even if they seem tiny and insignificant. No loving moment is ever wasted, the angels remind us. In fact these moments are pure gold.

Saturday, October 25, 2014

People are writing in asking me about Ebola, etc. and the angels answer is always the same. There have always been plagues, but the greatest virus on the planet is fear. Fear acidifies the body, makes the adrenals fire cortisol which causes the fight or flight response, tightens the muscles and cuts off circulation which in turn keeps the body from cleaning out correctly. Fear blocks the flow of love and fear is the root of all that we call evil. So what do we do when fear grips our own hearts? As human beings we have all been afraid.

There was a time in my life back in 2009 when totally irrational fears began to grip me. I knew they were crazy and yet I experienced them, physically, as if they were real. My body was reacting as if someone was going to break down my door and kill me. I'm psychic. I knew better. But nothing in me would give me any rest. Typically I sit, breathe, and ask Archangel Michael to readjust my energy and within minutes I am feeling more peace, but during this episode nothing would touch the fear. I shook. I tensed up. I felt crazy.

The angels sent me to get a past life regression from Robin Miller, the musician who plays heavenly music in my seminars, on my CD, and most recently during my show. I didn't know him well at the time but I took their advice, scheduled a session, drove to Sedona, and changed my life. Within two hours, in deep hypnosis, I saw lifetimes which would certainly inspire such fears! Being killed, imprisoned, etc... had left their mark upon my soul. The soul is like a pitcher of water. Each lifetime is like a glass poured out, having experiences, and then poured back in. When we come back to earth, our minds may not remember previous unresolved experiences, but something in us does and it can trigger some pretty crazy fears. To make a long story short, the session cured the fears.

It is not only these "big" fears that can grip up, but also the "every day" fears that are so common we barely notice them - fears of being late to work, fears of saying the wrong thing, fears about paying the bills... you name it. Each time we look at one of these fears we can face it, send it love, and in the case of many smaller fears dissolve them. We can say, "I see you and you're not real." We can breathe deeply, as we inhale, pulling in love, and as we exhale releasing fear and static. We can ask the angels soothe our energy as we do so.

It is very human to have fear, but the truth beneath it all is that we are eternal. We go on forever in our souls. We are cared for and loved by the creator of the universe and it it only our own misunderstandings - conscious and more often lurking beneath the surface subconsciously - that make us believe our fears. This week, pick one fear, big or small and breathe deeply. Ask the angels to help release you from its bondage. Your spiritual "immune system" is love any act of love, great or small, for self or another, will keep the virus of fear, and other viruses away from your system.

Love you all! Have a blessed and happy week.
Ann

PS - if you want some help from the angels, you can watch the trailer to my "Ann & the Angels" show... Listen to the music. Feel the words... and know you are loved. I don't know how they did it but it ended up being 4:44 long, and its got some good soothing energy coming through it!

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Allowing the feelings

In August and September I started noticing waves of people coming in for sessions, with waves of strong emotion. A phrase I heard over and over was "I feel so overwhelmed." It wasn't the overwhelm that comes from a lot of work, but rather the overwhelm that comes from a lot of emotion. Volcanoes were rumbling and venting in Papua New Guinea, Hawaii, Iceland, Ecaudor, Indonesia, and Japan... to name a few... and with Mother Earth's massive venting, I was starting to witness waves of human hearts venting the pressures they've carried for years as well. If you're not used to having strong feelings, it can be overwhelming when your soul starts to release the pressure and bring the stuffed emotions to the surface.

Over the years, the angels have taught me to accept everything that rises up within me - all of it - the good, the bad, and the ugly. Self acceptance is the key to transformation. So when I started having strong emotions come to the surface, I did what they've taught me to do. The day the tears came up (for reasons I still do not understand), I grabbed a towels and let myself sob without analysis or judgment. The day the upset came up and out about allowing myself to be mistreated by energies that feed off fear, I had a massive rant and rave in private of course. I put a bubble of light around myself so as to avoid sending nasty ripples out into the cosmic pond, and let myself have full range of feelings.

As a result the light is now flowing even more strongly than before. I've allowed these waves of energy to cleanse and purge me and to clear away the psychic debris and there is a new strength of conviction, new abilities emerging, and a renewed enthusiasm for all the projects "on my plate."

As the saying goes, "What we resist persists." When you feel strong emotions coming up, let them pass through you in private. You don't have to overanalzye or judge them. Just let them go, like a storm passing across the land that will eventually run out of energy and leave behind a refreshed and peaceful landscape.

Our souls are already whole. We are already holy. We are simply having a human experience and that sometimes requires clearing away the illusion that we are anything less than worthy of love, capable of expressing love, and in all truth, made of the very same.

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Answered prayers

I've been asking for help a lot lately! This new internet show has been such a joy to create and film and yet it has challenged me to grow, have faith, and embrace a level of commitment greater than anything I've had in the past. We can never take big steps in life without growth. This is why we take new steps, in fact. Our soul seeks expansion.

Last week we were so excited to air Episode 3. It contains some extremely useful information about how the angels solve problems vs. the way we humans do it. I was excited. Karl who runs the station was excited about the material. All 78 viewers online in the chat were excited. And then in the middle of the show, the internet at the transmitting end got flaky and the show stopped mid-stream. We were horrified, to say the least! Karl was scrambling to fix things. I was scrambling to try to tell viewers what to do, and texting him at the same time to figure out what to do. We ended up deciding to retransmit the following night.

My faith was sorely tested, but I had to shake my head and grin at the fact that this episode was a show on how heaven helps us solve problems! I have been so guided to do this, so I immediately focused on the love behind it and on believing in a solution. We can't control the internet, so we brainstormed and considered several different options. Karl immediately got the episode up as video on demand so all the viewers could see it as soon as possible, and then came up with the genius idea to transmit the show from a place where he could get higher and more reliable internet speeds. It involved extra time and travel on his end, but he was willing. Once we had the solution, I wrote to all our viewers explaining the improvements.

We re-broadcast Thursday night with a flawless stream and people loved it! One dear angel viewer even received a healing from back pain while watching the show! I know there was huge energy while we were filming, but I had no idea people would be getting this kind of help. Once again, God and the angels came through!

I have been constantly challenged to stretch my beliefs lately! It has been a long time since I've worked with anyone else, and a longer time since I let go of controlling all aspects of a project. In spite of the challenges, the reviews are amazing, the Streaming for the Soul folks are a delight to work with, and the show is working for people in ways we never envisioned! We've had two physical healings for viewers watching the show, huge shifts in thought patterns, people seeing auras, and a ton of reports from viewers starting to have more synchronicities and signs in their lives. People who don't even know each other are starting to connect and we're starting to build that community of positive energy and angelic inspiration that we envisioned when we started out.

So when you have a dream, and jump in, just know you will grow. Being a former engineer I try to think ahead and solve challenges before they occur, but I'm learning all over again, that I'm not in control of everything! I'm being stretched to pray even more, and ask for even more help. Of course, this first 12 week series is on creating a relationship with your angels in a much deeper way! I'm watching my own episodes, challenging myself to practicing what I preach more deeply, and happily watching the solutions and miracles appear in my life as well!

As the angels like to say, "You were never meant to live life on your own!" When a challenge great or small arises, pray for help. Believe it is there. Open to receive. Sometimes the solution is simply a change of heart in which you can accept what occurring. Sometimes the solution is a small change in thinking, or the way you do things. Sometimes the answer involves a lot of work, or getting help from someone else. Nonetheless, the solution to every perceived problem is there, just waiting.

Stop now. Imagine something you need help with in your own life. Ask for help and believe that help is there. Breathe in. You've just begun the process of receiving!

Saturday, October 04, 2014

Deeper desires

So many times we think we want things for one reason, but God knows the reasons go much deeper. When I wanted to quit engineering, I didn't realize my real desire was to find my own heart and soul and share my gifts with the world. I just thought I wanted to feel better.. At the time that was all I could wish for. I was so impatient to leave, thinking at the time that just getting away from an exhausting situation would make my life better. I thought God didn't hear or care abut my prayers many times, and it took years before I received the guidance to quit and move forward on the path I am now on.

Looking back I see that all the growth that was required during the years in between when I had the desire to quit and when I was actually guided and able to do so, was necessary. I had to discover who I was more deeply. I had to develop a greater confidence in myself and a better vision of my own worth. I definitely had to develop greater faith in God's love or quitting a stable career to start an unconventional one on my own would have been impossible. I had to become strong. People told me I couldn't make a living doing this. I had to honor my own knowing. I had to learn patience, trust, surrender, and an abiding faith in God's goodness - all things I can teach now, from a place of real integrity.

Likewise when I lived in an apartment years ago and had a desire for a new home, I just knew I wanted more space and beauty in my life. In the process of manifesting a home I had to learn to trust even more deeply, not to settle, and to have even more faith in God's love. I found a house that was almost right but not quite and when I decided not to settle for less than I truly desired, the Realtor for that house adopted me, and sent me listings. The house I am now in was the first one on the list! I knew instantly it was mine.

When I had the desire to reach more people with my class materials, I had no idea how it would be possible and even when technology became available to do it I didn't know if I could manage it on my own. Again God provided a solution. I just had to be patient and wait.

Two weeks ago I had a deep desire to create an easier sign up process for my show. As of last week we created better instructions, but when I prayed more, a more obvious solution came to me that involves a little extra work on our part, but makes the process very easy for our viewers.

So when you have a dream, don't put it aside just because you don't know how it can come about. Don't settle in your own mind and heart. And on the other side of the coin, don't get so impatient that your own fear blocks the process. Admit your dreams, anticipate your miracles, and wait for your guidance. In the meantime, enjoy your life knowing that you will grow in faith, self worth, and a sense of your own power to bring love to every moment of your days.

Saturday, September 27, 2014

Real success

Too often in my angel readings, I see people who do not feel like they are a "success" because they have not achieved some arbitrary standard of financial or material gain. The angels are quick to point out every area in these sweet soul's lives where they are a success - as good parents, kind listeners, creative souls - the qualities that last forever.

As well I've seen people get really inspired to embark on a project or dream, and then when it doesn't immediately start to give them material gain, they think they've failed. They forget their joy, work harder, and shift the focus from the passion to the gain. This doesn't work very well. We must always focus on our expression of love. The universe cannot by its very nature support our misery and choices to push ourselves without mercy. It can however, support every loving thought, word, and deed, and even superhuman efforts if they come from love.

I've had quite a few reminders of this lately with my newest project, the "Ann & the Angels" show. It has been a labor of pure love by myself and the Streaming for the Soul guys. We've put our hearts, finances, and many long hours into it, because we are fueled by a passion to share heavenly love and inspiration with the world. God is up to something good and we're only beginning to see the beautiful responses from viewers and the good things happening for people as they start to connect with their angels!

However, I've had a few very human moments when I questioned the entire project! We've had to make some tough technical decisions that make viewer set-up a little less automated than we'd like. I forgot how much much I take for granted as a former engineer and I was not nearly as clear as I thought, in my communications to people about how to help us set them up for Video-on-Demand. Nonetheless, we faced the growing pains and challenges with love, found clearer ways to communicate the set-up and now have things flowing smoothly. (If you are subscribed and having any challenges, please email me. I've revised the instructions to be way more clear!)

Looking back it has been worth every challenge and love-filled late night hour! The show was so beautifully received and the viewers are inspiring us right back! One dear woman asked her angels for help with a physical challenge during the show, and it just went away! Several more said that they saw auras for the first time (mine!). People are starting to write in and share their angel stories with me! It makes my heart sing. This is what I wanted... to create an easy way for people to feel the angels' love and connect with one another.

So, according to the heavenly definition - "to know and feel the joy of embracing and expressing the light within you" - I'd say this show is a success! I can't wait to see how it unfolds for all of us. And I'm thrilled to have finally found a venue to share the angel love and wisdom that I've been so blessed to receive. It really is a dream come true.

Be careful not to judge your "success" in life in terms of superficial criteria. As the saying goes, "You can't take it with you," meaning material things.... but what you do take with you into eternity is the love and goodness that you are and the joyful memories of your own experiences.

Today, look in the mirror today and see the incredible success story in front of you! No matter what your external circumstances, you are kind, loving, souls, desiring to share your light with the world in whatever fashion feels natural and happy for you! That means you - Yes You - are a huge success!

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Loving the light within all

I felt such a powerful and loving presence as I typed in that last message. I know Archangel Michael had a lot to do with it. This is one lesson I have been embracing even more deeply as of late - to love even those who hate and seek to harm me.

As many of you have read, I've been dealing with one big nasty energy that seems to have been out to get me. I had a long chat w/the angels and they explained that there are vibrations who seek to expose our fear so they can live off it. Its not much different really from dealing with sociopaths on earth - deeply wounded people who love you if you worship them, but attack you if you don't, and then feel good about themselves and powerful after having knocked you down. It is a sad reality and I pray for all souls who exist in these wounded and uncomfortable realities.

Nonetheless, when a vibration of this nature started attacking me, it wasn't the easiest thing to love it and acknowledge its right to be! I've dealt with angry humans. I've dealt with individuals in spirit who were so lost we'd call them "demons." In fact I've sent more than a few into the light of transformation and now am friends with their souls. But I've never dealt with an entire vibration that loved to poke and prod me to the point of bringing up every little past life fear I've ever had! It even attempting to possess me last month and when that didn't work in the waking state, it tried in my dreams.

This never happened when I was simply talking to angels. But now that I've started spending more time in the Oneness - that energy of God's all-that-is, the angels said, with a bit of humor... "Ann Oneness means Oneness... all of it! You can't pick and choose which vibrations you run into, but you CAN pick and choose which ones you will engage with." They equated it to living in a big city. If you stay securely locked up in your own apartment you will be "safe" for the most part, but if you walk down the street you run into all sorts of characters... and it is up to you to decide who and what energies you will dance with.

So I've been working very diligently to stay in the light. When I feel something icky around me I simply say, "You have a right to be, but not with me." I have been working very hard to face any and all fears that have come up, to love myself through them, and let them go. I've worked more closely with the angels in my own life than ever before to understand how to manage my own energy. Great good has come of this - great strength in my ability to choose the light over the darkness. It hasn't been an easy or a fun lesson, but the angels are always there to help, and I have a solid faith in the truth of God's love.

No matter what comes at us in life, the angels remind us, God is still God. Neither the unkind humans, nor the unkind energies have any power over us other than what we give them with our fear.

So as the world engages in its wars, and as some beings engage in their attacks upon our spirit in the human world - be it an angry ex, an upset coworker, or an energy that simply doesn't like the light - remember, God is still God! Love is the highest power in the universe. Practically speaking, we can choose to focus on the light within all. Imagine even the nastiest beings surrounded with light, and pray for their upliftment. Create healthy boundaries. Do not tolerate unkindnesses in your own life. Do not dignify the darkness with your thoughts even any more than you have to. There is always goodness. There is always beauty. There is always something wonderful happening and amazingly inspiring people on earth.

When you're down or tired, seek out that which inspires you. I turn to happy videos, inspiring books, and my own work which I am passionate about. And even after all these tough lessons, I give thanks to God because something REALLY good is going on if I'm learning to stand even more strongly in the light.

My "Ann & the Angels" show airs this Wednesday. It is the culmination of ten years of intention to reach people with my class material Online. It was born of a pure desire to share love and inspiration every week. I'm excited. I haven't seen any of the shows yet, but I know the material is good...whether or not my hair is :)!! And I am very excited about connecting with all of you. Please feel free to pass on the info, if you are so inclined, to anyone who might benefit from it.

This week, focus on the light and the good in the world, no matter what else is going on. It takes courage and strength not to get sucked into the world's pain but we serve far more beautifully when we do not.

Saturday, September 06, 2014

Don't dignify the darkness

I don't generally watch the news, but I was at the gym this week when the news came on... horrific. I almost burst into tears with sadness over the lost and angry souls that feel it necessary to kill a person and worse to sacrifice a human life to illustrate their point.

You cannot kill life. It rises up again. You can't kill a soul. They are alive in heaven. You can't kill an ideology. It just gets passed down from one to another. It is so sad to see those who think that killing solves a thing for in reality the first souls they will greet on the other side some day will be the ones they thought they "got."

So as I felt the sadness, the pain, the disgust, all of the sudden I caught myself. I knew what the angels would say. "Ann don't add to that vibration. Don't dignify the darkness by diving in Focus on truth. Focus on the one and only truth behind all of it... God's love is the constant and exists steadfast, like the sun, even behind the darkest storm. Focus on what is good so you can strengthen it!"

So I used every ounce of willpower to focus on all that is good, beautiful and true in humanity. I played music - first beautiful soothing music, then heart-pounding, energetic songs that strengthened my energy and my resolve to love. I thought of every wonderful, kind, brave soul I knew. And I imagined that column of light that exists connecting us all between heaven and earth in this giant sea of loving energy that we are all swimming in whether we know it or not. Soon energy was flowing like a river up my spine. I imagined light flowing through me, pouring out of my feet, wrapping the planet earth in a cocoon of love. My feet heated up like fire. I went into an altered state even while walking on the treadmill. I felt love pouring through every fiber of my being in a state of silent prayer for all of humanity.

My joy returned, and along with it an even greater resolve to "BE" the light and the love in this world. I prayed for those who were killed. I prayed for the upliftment of those who feel it OK to murder. I prayed for the families affected. I prayed that some day the world would be open minded enough to hear one another's perspectives without trying to snuff them out.

I felt God in my heart, reminding me, "I am always there, waiting to rise up within any human heart ready to receive me. Focus on that. Share that. Be that." We cannot change all the sad and angry acts of others, but we can refuse to "dignify the darkness by diving in" as the angels say. It takes willpower, courage, and commitment, but we CAN bring a greater love into the darkness.

Earlier in the week as I held a flower for a butterfly that was having trouble sipping nectar in the wind I thought of what the angels said to me a long time ago... "Ann, some day the world will realize what is important, like watching a bee on a flower." The eternal flow of life manifests in such beauty, in so many ways, that we need never "dignify the darkness by diving in." Even if we are guided to walk amidst the darkness, to aid in its transformation, and to uplift those stuck in its pain, we need not let its misery infiltrate our natural state of being. "Better to offer someone in quick sand a hand than to jump in with them and let them stand on your head while attempting to climb out," the angels once told me! I love that.

My prayer right now...

Dear God heal all hurting hearts and lift them out of the darkness and pain of illusion into the light of your love.

Have a blessed and joyful week... no matter what the world is doing,

Saturday, August 30, 2014

Emotional teachers…

Earlier this year I a feeling I’ve never felt before. It lasted for only a few days but it was the most puzzling sensation, because I didn’t even know what it was! I saw someone whom I’ll never even meet, who was graceful, beautiful, and very feminine, and instead of being overjoyed as usual, I started feeling cranky and having thoughts that weren’t so sweet. I finally asked the angels, “What on earth is going on with me.” "You’re jealous,” they answered honestly. Oh my God! I was appalled. Jealousy?

I’ve accepted my anger, my sadness, my despair at times, my anxiousness when it used to get me, but jealousy? I had always prided myself on never being a jealous person! I almost always love myself, my life, and my choices. I am almost always happy for other’s success. However, since the feeling was there, I knew it had something to teach me.

I did what the angels have always told me to do. I sat down, went within myself, and said, “OK jealousy, what are you trying to tell me? I’m listening.” The answers came quickly. “I want to be more feminine. I want to be pampered. I like being strong, but every now and then I want to be softer.”

“Well that was easy,” I thought to myself. It was as simple as owning the fact that I saw someone else embracing an energy that I had neglected to acknowledge within myself. It was true! I was missing the softer side of my being. I’ve been chopping up trees, lifting heavy stuff, climbing ladders, and crawling around my attic in my spare time. After work I’ve been at the computer working on my website. I had simply forgotten to take care of the feminine side of my being. Simple, but when we neglect something within ourselves it will reveal itself one way or another. If we ignore an aspect of our being, the truth may reveal itself in a so-called negative emotion to get our attention.

I was much gentler with myself the following week. I gave myself the kindness I had wished for. I pampered myself a little more and wore clothes that made me feel more feminine. While this might seem superficial, the angels remind me that being human is part of the experience here on earth and one I shouldn’t negate! A few days ago I stood next to a beautiful, feminine, pampered woman in line at the grocery store and we had a lovely conversation. Having taken care of my own needs, it was once again easy to celebrate the good fortune of others.

So if you feel something less than loving, first of all don’t beat yourself up! We’re already spiritual. We don’t have to try to be that. We’re already good inside. We don’t have to prove anything to God. We’re already light, even when we feel dark. Instead, just go within and ask the feeling what its trying to tell you. Embrace it. Own it! Its yours and its a gift. Although it might be triggered by someone else, it comes from your soul. Celebrate. You are being given a key that unlocks the locked doorways of the soul, and releases your light into an even greater awareness, expression, and experience of life.

Embrace everything that comes up within you. When a seed sprouts, the first thing you see is the dirt being pushed up to the surface, which inevitably makes way for new growth and new life.

Saturday, August 23, 2014

Illuminating the darkness

It has been an intense few weeks! When a simple trip in late July became a massive adventure with flights cancelled, and a big storm doing damage to my home and yard I knew something was “off” in the energy. My life is normally calm, peaceful, and easy because I no longer give into the drama I once did. I handled the expenses, physical labor, and repairs with great grace.

Two weeks ago, however, I started to see that something bigger was going on. I started experiencing all sorts of little disruptions in my life. I did what I always do - just handled them, sent love, and went about my day. I was finally forced to take note of the bigger picture, when I was working peacefully in my office and I got the sudden message from my angels to go to the backyard, look up, and pray. I listened, and was surprised to see that the previously sunny day had become ominously dark, and there was another huge storm aiming for my neighborhood like a train on a track. It didn’t look normal. It looked angry. The wind was ferocious and the clouds were rolling in at an alarming rate. None of the folks in my neighborhood were ready to deal with more damage. We were all still focusing on repairs from the previous storm.

I knew I better get in my God-given power and pray. I threw my hands up in the air, and prayed, “Dear God, bring us peace. Dear weather spirits, I know you must obey the stirred up human emotions on the planet, but I am sending you love and peace now. Please go and do us no harm.” I tuned into every ounce of love and peace in my heart and just stood there in a vibration of total calm. I focused on the fact that we are all One and the vibrations of the external clouds live inside of me too. I felt energy pouring outward from my heart and then I felt energy pouring through the top of my head and into the ground. I have never witnessed such a thing but the wind changed and the storm blew away and dissipated. A friend commented on it later that week, without me saying a thing. He said he’d never seen a storm race in and then just go away like that.

At the time, I could barely believe it. I felt crazy. I went into the house and shook, realizing that the angry energies on the planet wanted company, and were seeking any openings they could find in human hearts to create disruption. I looked back at the patterns of clients coming in lately and realized that many of the light workers were also experiencing similar chaos, disruption, and challenges. Although I understood it all, my body locked up in fear, my back and digestion turned into a mess the next several days and I knew it was time to dive within myself.

I asked only one question, “What inside of me allowed this chaotic vibration to attack me?” And then I intended, “Come to the surface and be released.” I sat and breathed and asked my angels for help. I went to Dr. Shawn Warwick (who if you live in Phoenix is an amazing energy worker). I opened to channel the healing energies I bring through for others. And I shook. I shook like I was having Ann-quakes. As fears from other lifetimes came to the surface, so too did feelings that have nothing to do with my present life. Feelings of having messed up, disappointed God, you name it! I felt like I had opened Pandora’s box of lies and was clearing all the old junk and gunk out of my soul. And even though it was hard, physically painful, and exhausting, I am celebrating! Better out than in. It is these hidden illusions that can often allows the denser energies to create chaos in our lives. And when we free ourselves to truly embrace the light and the love that we are, even the deepest darkness cannot penetrate. At long last when I was able to get fully present once again and reaffirm the truth of the light within, the heat flooded through me like a river, unlocked my body and all pain was gone in a matter of seconds.

If you are not experiencing any disruption now, celebrate! You are standing in truth! And if you are, celebrate too because you’re simply at a point where you’re diving deeper. A single candle, as the saying goes, can illuminate even the darkest room, and your willingness to love yourself through anything can illuminate even the most challenging life circumstances. So don’t push your feelings away, embrace them. Love yourself through them. In doing so we transform all that is within us to greater light and greater love.

Saturday, August 16, 2014

Letting go to receive

Every now and then a song completely grabs my heart. The one in the video below did that recently, "I don't dance," Is a song about a man who is giving up what he "didn't do" for the love of a woman. The reason it touches my heart is because I have given up all I thought I once was to discover a love greater than I ever thought possible - a love that lives in every crack, corner, and crevice of creation... and inside our own hearts.

Two decades ago if you had asked me who I was I would have said, I am an avionics engineer. I am religious. I am married. I am "smart." I thought psychics were full of nonsense, and I thought the "woo woo" people were really weird. I thought I had my whole life planned out.

Little by little, I admitted to myself that in spite of having everything I thought I needed to be happy, I was empty, lost, and lonely. And thus began the journey of seeking happiness that led me to shed so many layers of identity. I gave up my marriage, my dogs, my career, my home, my judgments, my unworthiness, my forgiveness, my arrogance, my anger, my pain and sadnesses from the past, indeed all that defined me. I gave up my need to identify with being "the smart girl" and learned to turn off my brain so I could access a greater intelligence. I gave up my need to be "in control" of everything so I could surrender to a greater ease. I gave up my need to "save" and "fix" people so I could truly be of service. I gave up my "disease to please" so I could live more authentically. The more I let go, the more I received.

There will always be more to let go. We are, after all, human! Just a few weeks ago when the storm hit my house it took every ounce of will power not to get into drama, but instead to choose peace, ease, grace, and joy in spite of the impact to my time, bank account, and emotions. I'm glad I did. As I write this a/c repair guys are inspecting my attic for leaks in the duct work. I'm not leaking my energy over it!

It does take will power to release what does not serve us. Our cultures supports drama, victimhood, martyrdom, and a whole host of other unhappy behaviors and beliefs. It takes courage to look at yourself and say, "This isn't working." Let me choose a better situation, better thoughts, or a better way of dealing with life. It takes courage to say, "I trust God. I do not have to be in control of everything once I've done my part." People may not understand or support you in releasing the culturally accepted patterns in exchange for higher truth. It doesn't matter. As we let go, we gain. As we release we are embraced. As we discard the illusions, we walk in greater truth.

My letting go didn't happen all at once. It happened one small decision at a time. And it wasn't always easy. It was once hard for me to let go of my scarcity mentality long enough to pay $3 for a cup of coffee. It was once difficult to say, "I can't do this," to someone even when I was near exhaustion. It was once hard to sit still and rest. And yet with each tiny choice to let go of what no longer served, a greater light and greater joy came into my life.

As the angels say, "When you open to a trickle of love, soon it becomes a stream that runs into the rivers, that cascade into oceans of love." See if you can let go of a few thoughts that don't make you happy this week, a few tendencies towards drama, or a few self-criticisms. Trade them in for better ones, and as you do so, notice how greater joy is and always has been there waiting to be embraced.

Saturday, August 09, 2014

Opportunities to love

The world is stirred up, to say the least. Threats of increased war in the middle east, big storms, viruses, you name it. I've seen more people coming in with entities and crazy energies clinging to them than ever before. I've been casting out demons, cleaning off auras, and striving to be a force of peace, calm, and love in the world. In the midst of this, as I wrote last week, my house and yard was slammed by a storm with winds as strong as a category 3 hurricane! My body which tends to resonate a lot with the earth feels such pressure lately I've had to do extra stretching and energy work just to keep the channels open. I've been getting up early and staying up late to work on a new and improved website among other things.

And yet, at a time when things look challenging on the outside, all I feel is an incredible beauty and grace to life. Things that used to bother or challenge me just seem like things to be handled – just items on a to do list. My beloved tree is gone but a new baby will soon be planted. The leaking ceilings have already been fixed. The ductwork will be checked out next week. Even though there were large expenses and large inconveniences in terms of scheduling repairs, great blessings have arisen. The repair folks were wonderful. The neighbors were so sweet and helpful. I'm working overtime to pay off the bills but after borrowing energy from the recent hurricanes I find myself with incredible stamina to do so. What looked like a little disaster has only created room for more love.

So when life seems chaotic, when those around you are all stirred up, or when things don't go your way, instead of getting sucked into the drama, the story, the upsets, and the tragedies, try your best to look for the love in the situation and to remember that no matter what occurs we can bring love into the situation. Start with love and kindness for yourself, an acceptance of your feelings about the situation and then ask... "What is the most loving way I can handle this, in a way that honors myself first, and all others?" Pray. Ask for help with the answer to that question. Your angels will give you amazingly creative ideas. My angels suggested I save some sections of my tree's trunk and now I meditate on them barefoot every day, enjoying the spirit of the tree I once loved as it teaches me the wisdom of greater strength and flexibility.

Know that no matter what we go through on earth, we are all beautiful souls, working diligently to remember our essential nature – our core beauty, brilliance, love, and light. All things presented to us are just adventures we embrace, mirrors we look into, and situations that give us an opportunity to become more strongly rooted in love. This week, when life presents a challenge, just say to yourself, "Ah ha! Another chance to find the love, be the love, love myself, and share the love."

Saturday, August 02, 2014

Safety in the storms

I have heard so many stories that illustrate the angels' point about security resting within. I know a woman who, in the middle of being physically attacked, surrendered her life to God's grace, and were cast aside by the attacker. I knew a lady who was accosted by a man with a knife in Italy on a vacation. She was tall and he was short and she started laughing at him until he left in disgust! I know clients who have chosen faith over fear even in dire financial circumstances... and we have watched their miracles come through.

I had my own demonstration of the safety and security of resting in God's love last weekend. I had taken time off last week to work on my website but after days of staring at the computer I knew I needed a breather. My grandfather in spirit has been telling me for some time to take a quick little vacation and when a dear client gave me free airline tickets, I knew heaven's hints were becoming less subtle! I packed my bags and got ready for a little two day trip over the weekend. While I was pulling my car out of the driveway something stopped me and compelled me to go back inside and unplug my electronics. Without knowing why I prayed extra prayers for the protection of my home and everyone in the neighborhood. "Angels," I whispered, "Is everything OK?" "You'll be fine! Go have fun," I heard them whisper back.

Driving to the airport I had total faith that all would be well. It was actually a surprise when I found out that all flights to my destination had been cancelled. Furthermore so many people from those flights had been re-routed to nearby cities that there was little likelihood of me flying via the free passes. The most logical thing to do would have been to go home and reschedule my trip. Something stopped me... I sat back, shut my eyes, and dropped into my heart. My heart wanted this trip. The angels had suggested this trip. So in spite of every shred of rational programming. I bought a ticket to a neighboring city, found a shuttle service that would drive me over an hour after I landed, and continued on my journey. Three hours later than planned and several dollars shorter, I arrived. I did not realize at the time that this "impractical" but heart-centered decision saved me from living through one of the worst storms Phoenix has seen in years.

I had no idea that while I was enjoying peace, calm, and play, my neighborhood back home was getting pounded by a macro-burst that was centered less than a few blocks from my house. The storm brought with it 100+ mile per hour winds, torrential rain, huge hail, and lightning that made the ground shake. Neighbor kids were so scared they hid in their pantry. Trees either came down or were stripped of their leaves. Roof tiles were ripped off. As I drove home from the airport it looked like a tornado had gone through the neighborhood. Debris littered the streets, but for the most part, the houses were all intact. And no one had been hurt.

I pray every day to be protected by standing in the light of God's love. I surround everyone and everything around me with light. My huge and beautiful mesquite tree was ripped up by the roots and tossed on her side. My roof vents were ripped off and water seeped into the ceiling, causing a little damage. My shed exploded with its walls cast out in all directions. But in the greater scheme of things, my neighborhood and I were protected indeed! No homes were destroyed and no one was hurt. My elderly neighbor was home and the tree missed his house by only a few feet. It was miraculous. I did cry a few tears of grief for the tree, but I was incredibly grateful we were all spared.

Rest assured knowing that if you pray for, and truly believe in God's protection, you will be guided to safety in your lives to. Life does "happen" as we say. We live in a collective creation of all souls on earth, and we are affected by others. But if we put our faith deeply in the Creator's love we will be guided into a kinder and more gentle reality.

Saturday, July 26, 2014

Finding peace

After working with angels nearly two decades, I've come a long way in learning to allow everything that arises with me to be expressed, at least in private. I rarely get mad anymore, but every now and then something triggers me. Instead of taking this out on anyone else, the angels have taught me to go to my journal and give myself permission to rant and rave, whether reasonably or not. And so I do. I let out all my feelings, whether rational, reasonable, or even justifiable on paper. I type and type and type and write the letters to souls, saying the things that I would never say in person. Inevitably what occurs after awhile is that I get a new perspective. I see what changes I must make in my own mind, my own life, or my own heart to return to love. I usually find compassion for myself and for anyone else involved. Like clearing pipes in which mud and dirt have built up, suddenly the clear feelings run through me like clear water.

The angels have also taught me to let go of my attachment to how others behave, think, and act, and to allow others to be as they are. If I do not like how a person is behaving, they've taught me to kindly ask them to change, or to learn to allow. They've taught me to either stay or move away from relationships depending on whether or not compromises and loving solutions can be reached. And in this way I've been able to avoid a lot of unnecessary drama, and wasted time. Others either belong in my life or they don't. I can either work things out with someone or I can't. All wishful thinking must be laid by the wayside and I must deal with the reality of the person in front of me. I have been taught to be impeccably honest - my own feelings, and to keep my opinions of those in front of me to myself unless they have asked me to share. It has taken a lot of practice, and a lot of really looking deeply at my own ego needs to finally be able to "live and let live."

I'll never forget a time someone near to me said they were concerned about my soul. They read one of my books and decided I needed to take religious classes to correct my perspective of reality. At first I tried to explain myself, but the angels told me to "stop seeking agreement," and simply come from the heart. I finally told this individual that I loved them but I was quite happy with my belief system. I told them that I would never presume to tell them what they should believe about life, and I requested that even if they could not agree with me, I was asking them to accept that I was choosing the path for my life that was right for me. If they could not do that, I kindly said I would not be a part of their life. We had a long discussion on the difference between acceptance and agreement,"II accept that what you choose is right for you, even if I do not agree." At long last we agreed to disagree, and to love rather than to have a need to be "right" in any ultimate sense of the word. It made continuing the relationship possible.

Years ago, I was crying over the fact that my family did not understand my new found mystical beliefs. I was praying, "God how do I get them to understand me?" Jesus showed up in my vision, clear as day. "Stop trying to get them to understand you," He said. He had my attention. The sheer power of His love made me stop crying. I listened. "They will understand your love," He said simply and then left. They will understand your love. That one statement changed my life. Now when I disagree with someone I attempt a dialogue. If not possible, I simply let them be, make a clear decision about whether or not I want them in my life "as they are," and choose to be loving and kind no matter what. In this fashion, I have finally found peace within. We all can...

Saturday, July 19, 2014

The right wrong turns

I'm laughing at the angels' mention of "No Wrong Turns." As you read llast week, I finally took a big road trip to see the glorious slot canyons in Northern, AZ. One of the things that kept me from doing it so long, in addition to the many other excuses I had, was a subtle fear of getting lost on the highways. I like taking off on my own but in doing that I have no one else with whom to confirm directions. I do not have a cell phone because I don't need one, and I don't have a car that talks to give me directions. So when I go anywhere I do things the old fashioned way. I print out maps and memorize the turns.

I was enjoying a beautiful sunrise drive on Route 66 north of Flagstaff, that turned into Highway 89. The pine forests gave way to grassy meadows. In time the highway was bordered by beautiful mountains on the Navajo reservation, and dotted by roadside stands, farm country, and the rare gas stations. I had wonderful songs blasting on my iPod and was deeply enjoying the scenery when I realized that I had driven over 100 miles and the turnoff to Page, AZ was supposed to be at the 82 mile mark. I could not, for the life of me, recall seeing an intersecting highway. I decided to drive farther to the next gas station since I couldn't remember where the last one had been!

The highway snaked and rolled through beautiful countryside. Red rock mountains in the distance were dotted with white bands of what appeared to be limestone. A mixture of cactus and scrub brush carpeted the landscape. A house here, a church there, and just as I started getting nervous, I found myself crossing a beautiful huge bridge over a sapphire blue River into the entrance to Lee's Ferry at Glenn Canyon, and the Vermillion Cliffs. I pulled the car over and started laughing! Just last week I had seen the Vermillion Cliffs online and made a mental note that I'd like to visit them "some day." I had decided that including them into this weekend trip would be too much. Yet, here I was at 8:00am in the morning staring at these treasures!

I drove up to the lone Chevron gas station where the kind clerk informed me I had to drive back 40 miles to get to the turn-off to Page, AZ. Thanking the angels for waking me up early, I realized I'd make it to the canyons just in time to catch the perfect late morning light. In the meanwhile I fueled up the car, snapped some photos and finally turned around to continue to my original destination. No wrong turns indeed!

Of course, as I wrote last week, the trip was breathtaking and beautiful. Nature's splendor and raw power held me in an awe-inspired embrace the entire time. And even though I drove over 630 miles in two days I was not at all tired. I was overjoyed!

The lessons weren't over however! On the way home, Zippy, my car angel, reminded me I needed to take the car in for service as soon as I got back. Prior to the trip the car felt like it was wobbling. I had the tires checked and asked the angels if I'd be safe on the road. "Yes you'll be fine but take me in right after you get back," my car angel replied! A few days later at the repair shop, I was simultaneously appalled, and delighted to find out that my brakes were shot, my engine and transmission mounts had collapsed (which explained the wobble!), and there were a variety of other things wrong with the car. It was a HUGE repair bill but I have a credit card, thank God, and I was SAFE! Had I known all this before the trip I would have canceled it and missed my opportunity once again to do something I'd always wanted to do. No wrong turns... once again.

So when you think you've made a mistake, think again. Maybe you created a great lesson. Maybe you're giving yourself a new opportunity. Maybe you're really doing the right thing, but just not what you thought you wanted. Every opportunity is an opportunity to see love. I could have been frustrated with my first wrong turn and ruined my mood and my entire trip. Instead I saw divine synchronicity! I could have freaked out about the car problems and the scary-big bill, but instead I saw the Divine protection that I always pray for, and the grace I was given to enjoy the trip without worry. Every time we do something we think is "wrong" we can turn it around by seeing the love within it.

Try it this week - when you find yourself in a situation where you feel you've done or said the "wrong" thing, look for the love. "Seek and ye shall find. Knock and the door will be opened." Have a blessed week.

Saturday, July 12, 2014

Another Some Day Saturday

My sunrise hike up Cathedral rock a few weeks ago inspired me. “What else have I been putting off that I want to do?” I asked myself the question and immediately the thought of visiting Antelope Canyon popped in my head. Ever since I’d seen this natural marvel with its sinuous curves of red, yellow, and purple sandstone in a travel magazine years ago I’ve had a craving to experience it for myself.

However, as often happens, excuses got in the way. It is a 5 1/2 hour drive north of Phoenix. There are only certain times of year when you are guaranteed a tour, as any threat of rain within miles causes closure. Being in a canyon carved out by flash floods is a bad idea when it is flooding! I used cost, time, effort, etc. all as excuses. And every year I reached the rainy season regretting I had not taken the journey. I realized that the last weekend in June was my only window of opportunity. I still didn’t know how I would fit 11 hours of driving into a two day trip and enjoy it, so I sat down, prayed, and waited for the answer.

An easy answer soon became obvious. I threw my stuff in the car and took off after work on Friday driving the first three hours to Flagstaff, AZ where I slept in the cheapest motel I could find. It was clean and did the job. I was up before sunrise the next morning to continue on my journey. I got my “Kicks on Route 66” as the song goes before it turned into Highway 89 and continued onward to Page. I took a little unintended detour but that will be the subject of another story!

Once in town I headed straight for “Ken’s Tours” of Lower Antelope Canyon. A quick five minute walk with our guide to the canyon entrance had us standing at the top of a steep set of steel steps. Descending into the deep red-orange slot in the rocks I felt as if I was being embraced by the spirit of our Mother Earth herself. Our young Navajo guide played the flute in the first echoing chamber as we ooh’ed and ahh’ed over the beauty evident from every angle. The views just kept getting better. We stepped carefully on the sandy twisting path that led us in and out of some of the most beautiful rock formations I have ever seen in my entire life. I snapped photos rapidly, not sure I could even begin to capture the wonder of it all. The warm embracing earth and the energy of the water that carved out this amazing place filled me with a sweet, peaceful hum. I was in heaven.

Later that day I took the Upper Antelope Canyon tour I had booked. It too was breathtaking, but out of a love for the first tour in Lower Antelope Canyon, I returned for another. My late afternoon trip into this Canyon was accompanied only by another young guide, and three tourists. The silence, solitude, and beauty was overwhelming, and due to the time of day, the rocks which had been glowing red, orange, and yellow in the earlier daylight were now turning deep shades of crimson and purple. The earth embraced us, as only a mother can, and I emerged from the canyon as if I was being birthed once again by the forces of nature that shape our planet and shape our hearts as well.

Still filled with energy, I decided that a sunset trip to Horseshoe Bend - a scenic overlook high up over Glen Canyon and just ten minutes from town - would be the the perfect ending to an amazing day. Had I been slightly crazier I might have slept out on the rocks, under the stars, but a scorpion darting away from my hiking boots on the trail back convinced me the motel might be a better option! The next day I broke up the long drive back into two segments by starting early and resting in Sedona on the way home. I could not believe I had used thge long driving time as an excuse to put off this beautiful journey for so many years!

So the next time you find yourself longing to do something but making excuses, pray. Ask God and the angels for insight as to how you might make it happen. Trust the timing. And when you have the urge, act upon it. When the urge hits me, I will no longer be saying, “I’ll do that some day.” I will no longer be making excuses when I really want to make something happen. I have experienced too much beauty, grace, and wonder the past few weeks to put off my life one moment longer.

There are dreams that take more time than I have at the moment. There are dreams that take money I do not yet have. There are dreams I know I will want to do at some point but am not urgent about now. But I do know, that when the desires in your heart are planted there by God, water them with your acknowledgment. Shine the sun of your “yeses” upon them. And then when the desires ripen and turn into hungers, urges, and urgency, pluck them from the tree of life and make them happen. God will show you the way! Some day? How about now?

Saturday, July 05, 2014

Saturday, My Some Day...

I think we've all said, "Some day I want to do this!" "Some day I'm going to do that." And while it is true that many of my "some day" wishes are things I do not yet have the money and time to do, and honestly, not yet the driving desire, there are many things that I have wished to do and have not done.

One of these desires was a relatively small thing, a simple but deep wish to climb Cathedral Rock in Sedona, Arizona, to watch the sunrise. I had, as many of us do, plenty of excuses. I will have to get up at 2am in Phoenix and drive two hours while I'm asleep to make it, OR I'll have to take time off, drive up the night before, and spend my hard earned money on a hotel room just for this tiny hike. It didn't make financial sense. It didn't make practical sense. I caught myself finally and reminded myself that if I only did things that made sense, I'd live a pale shadow of the life I truly want to live! So I stopped making "sense" and decided to work extra, thus making clients happy, and just get a hotel room in Sedona the night prior.

That inspired a torrent of other wonderful ideas. I could go up the day before and have an entire day of following my heart! So I hopped in the car early in the morning with a small suitcase, food, and water, and hit the highway, not even knowing where I would end up. It ends up, I ended up in Flagstaff, Arizona, hiking in one of nature's breath taking cathedrals - an aspen forest where the chalk white giant trees reach into a sky so sapphire blue that I surely felt as if I could dissolve into it all. Cool, crisp mountain air filled my lungs and cleansed my soul as the sun warmed my skin. Shadows played with light on the rocks. Wild irises amidst knee-high grasses carpeted the forest floor and a symphony of bees, locusts, and the occasional cry of a raven circling overhead vibrated through my very being. I lay down on a fallen tree and simply allowed myself to drift, surrendering the boundaries of my human self and melting into the Oneness of it all.

Suddenly the urge to get in the car and drive south hit me. I had not known the highway between Flagstaff and Sedona was open after the big fire a few weeks ago but to my surprise it was. I only discovered this by following my instincts and driving! I was able to see not only the burned hillsides but also the beautiful green that has been preserved all the way down the scenic drive. A hike I had always wanted to try, popped in my head. There wasn't another person on the trail for the entire two hours. In spite of 100 degree temperatures, I was charged with nature's energy. No more solid and separate I felt as if I were one with the landscape again, like the wind blowing along the trail, or simply a thought in the mind of God moving through the greater Self.

Finally, after all these years of saying I would do this "some day" I parked at the base of the Cathedral rock trail in total darkness at 4am. A crescent moon shone above, silhouetting the mountains in the distance. A few crickets chirped, but other than their song, the morning was deeply silent. A sweet peace filled my soul and as soon as my eyes became accustomed to the dark, I began the climb. The rocks emanated a pleasant warmth that they had absorbed from the previous day. Half way up the trail, tints of silver light began to appear over the horizon, and the mountain came to life. Rodents and lizards rustled in the brush. The wind that comes as the warmth of day begins to dance with the cool of night began to blow softly. Birds awakened and began their sweet song of welcome. I reached the top in time to see the moon and stars being chased away by the softly glowing pink light on the horizon. Five other individuals were already there. A young woman sang her praise to the day by doing yoga "sun salutations." Three younger guys wrapped in blankets were waiting with their cameras. An older native gentleman sat in silent reverie with a giant crystal strapped to his third eye, preparing to infuse it with the light of the new day.

Then, suddenly as the birds sang louder, and the locusts began their endless hum, our beautiful golden star burst over the mountains to the east in a stunning display of liquid light. It filled the valley, brought the glowing red rocks to life and reached into every crack, corner and crevice of my soul. I shut my eyes and opened every cell and aspect of my being to this light, inviting it to fill me, merge with me, and become one. Once again, I lost all track of my body, and became only a thought, only light melting into light, with pulsating energy pounding both from within and without. No longer just Ann, I perceived the greater self. I was the mountains, the valley, the stone, and the sky. I was the earth and the space in between. I felt suspended in a timeless space of blinding bright light, in silence... sensing only love, feeling only an expanded sense of reality. When I finally opened my eyes, my third eye was pounding, and my entire body felt electrified, humming with life. There was not even a trace of fatigue.

Back at home the next day I was able to achieve monumental amounts of work. I was inspired to work on projects I've put off for some time. Even after putting 300 miles on the car, hiking about 4-5 miles on foot, and having very little sleep over the past two days, I felt fantastic.

So this week think about your "Some day" things and see if you can take steps towards them. I am starting to catch myself when I say "some day" and ask myself, "Do you want to create that now Ann?" And if so, what can you do now towards that dream? Some dreams involve saving money. Some involve blocking off dates on the calendar. Some I don't have a clue how to bring about so I'll just visualize and pray for them, for now. In doing any of these things, as the angels say, we call forth Life, precious energy, and love into our lives.

Try it... it affects every aspect of your existence to allow joy to flood into your heart in this fashion. And while most of us have to work to pay the bills, life is too short to only focus on survival. Dream this week... start down the path to your "some days."

Saturday, June 28, 2014

Felicity...

Last week, I forgot to get eggs at the grocery store. After putting away the groceries I had remembered, I hopped back in the car and went to finish my shopping. The day was beautiful and in spite of the extra trip I was happily driving along when a bird suddenly dove in front of my vehicle. I slammed on the brakes but it was too late. The little one lay in the street. Thankfully there was no traffic so I pulled over to check on her. She was in the process of dying. “Oh GOD, what do I do?” I prayed. "Pick her up and send her energy to assist her transition,” was the answer. I gently picked her up, walked to the side of the road, and held her to my heart. The heat began to flow from my hands. Her little talons gripped my shirt and she looked into my eyes before shutting her own and leaving her sweet little feathered body. Crying, I jumped in my car, still holding her little form to my heart with one hand and driving back home with the other.

I surrounded her with leaves and flowers and ran energy to assist any final energies in leaving the body. I prayed for her spirit. “May you always know God’s love no matter what form you take. May you feel my love for you. May you always fly free and feel the joy of being. May any pain you have suffered be erased from your memory.” "Are you free?" I asked, and suddenly I was overwhelmed and surrounded by the love of a soul I can only describe as angelic. "Thank you," I heard. That did it. I burst into tears.

“Why God?” I asked, being human to my core. I felt her magnificent soul, but why did she have to die by my car? The angels stopped me. “You are learning deeper levels of trust now. We are not going to tell you why. Breathe. Calm down now and start thinking of the infinite number of reasons she may have chosen to die this way.” I stopped sniffling and took a few deep breaths. “She wanted love as she died?” It was more of a question based on past information. The angels once told me that animals came to me to die because they loved to feel my tremendous love on their way out.

“Keep going,” they told me. “Think of other possible reasons.” “She was keeping me from being in an accident by delaying me,” I said, still asking a question. “Keep going.” “She was done with her time on earth and wanted a quick exit.” “She gave me a piece of her beautiful spirit on the way out.” “She was inspiring this newsletter.” It became obvious the angels were not going to divulge the reason, They just kept telling me, to keep going, to keep listing possible reasons for her death. “She took some energy off this planet with her in her death.” “She was a soul who decided to try being a bird and changed her mind.” “She wanted to feel love at a level she never had and knew I would give it to her.” “She was teaching me that even when we don’t have a clue about why something happens, God does.” I had to stop there and cry some more.

I felt I had stumbled upon the truth. “Maybe it is a combination of many of those things,” the angels gently offered, still not giving me the “answer.” I understood. They want me to trust everything, even when I am too worked up or biased to understand. They want me to stop using my mind to push away the love that is always there, even in tough circumstances, and to trust in God’s great love. They wanted me to trust that every being is in a beautiful dance even when I fail see it. This isn't easy, but there is purpose to the exercise. I've been asking to continue expanding to channel God's healing energies. If I am attached to anything I will get in the way. If I am viewing anything as less than love, I filter the amount of love that can flow through me. I know this. I have been praying to abide in deeper truths. God is giving me opportunity to do so.

As I sat contemplating these things, the angelic spirit of the little bird surrounded me again with her love. This time I simply shut my eyes and basked in the love. "Do you have a name," I asked. "Felicity," she offered as I felt my heart well up with great joy. I looked up the name later on the Internet. It means "Great Happiness."

So this week, do your best. Try to assume that there is love and purpose behind everything even when you don't understand. And if you need to understand, allow yourself to do the exercise the angels gave me and list off every possible reason something has happened in your life, no matter how crazy it might sound. Then maybe you can call upon this sweet angel teacher of mine, Felicity, and ask her to bring happiness and peace to your heart too.