Sunday, October 27, 2013

Embrace change

I have let go of so much this lifetime, sometimes willingly and sometimes with a great deal of guilt or grief. I have had people leave my life, and I have had to leave some people who were in my life. I left behind a life, a marriage, a house, and all my friends. I clean the closets regularly, and just as often, re-evaluate my beliefs to see which ones no longer serve me.

At first, letting go was difficult. I was raised with the same beliefs many of us were. "Get a good education. Find the perfect job, the perfect partner, and the perfect home. Create the perfect family and live happily ever after without deviating too much from this 'recipe for success.'" That didn't work! When I figured out who I really was I released almost everything including what I thought was my own identity! It was terrifying, beautiful, and life-changing all at the same time.

Now I no longer resist when I must let go of an attachment, a belief, a thing, or a situation. I honor my heart. And if I can't release a person or situation, I pray for help in releasing any beliefs or behaviors inside of me that make that situation unpleasant. We can always find new ways to think about and deal with who or what is in front of us.

For example, years ago I worked with some individuals that I found to be completely boring. They talked about themselves and bragged incessantly. I "made nice" and "put up with" the conversations because I had to work with them. I didn't know how to let go of this situation. Finally it occurred to me to pray. "Ask them what they enjoy doing outside of work," the angels counseled me. So I listened to the angels and posed this question to one individual who loved to brag about his brains. To my amazement, the conversation took a turn that was completely interesting to me! I couldn't let go of working with him, but I could let go of my need to "shut up and put up," and take more charge of the conversations. We ended up being friends over the fact that we both enjoyed music, and this individual who used to make me cringe when I saw him coming, suddenly became human to me.

Letting go happens almost every time I go through a huge transformation in my life, energy or spiritual growth. People leave my life. I feel the urge to purge my closets. I want to detox my body, and clean out my soul. It is no longer a scary prospect to let go, but rather a natural phase in the process of the soul's evolution.

If you can embrace change, there is blissful freedom in letting go. In truth, it is an act of faith that there is really more or better yet to come.

Saturday, October 19, 2013

How to have a miracle!

I have been living in a miracle-filled life ever since February when I started doing the gazes with Braco (pronounced Brahtz-so). The light that comes through him has drawn forth and expanded the light within me - the same light that is within all of us. I have had miraculous physical healings, and my life has flowed with greater grace, ease, and joy than ever before. My poetry and creativity have returned, along with the desire to finish projects, website, etc., and to get back to writing. Life is amazing. And most joyous of all, one of my dearest and most heartfelt prayers has been answered. Lately, sometimes when the energy turns itself on, the miraculous has been happening through me.

A few weeks ago a dear long-time client messaged me on facebook. She had injured herself and wanted to know if I could help. As I started to write back that I would intend that healing energy be sent her way, I felt a heat like fire go through me. I didn't know what it was doing, so I just hit "send." I was dumbfounded when she wrote back that as she read the message, the heat flamed through her and the pain just disappeared. I cried tears of intense gratitude.

It happened with another dear client who came with a migraine she had suffered with for months. I felt as if a giant vacuum was placed on my head and something sucked up and out of her, through my heart and out my head. Suddenly the lights came on in her eyes. She smiled. Her migraine disappeared. I can't control this. I am not sure I completely understand the mechanics of it (although being a former engineer I'd love to!!), and yet it has put me in an entirely different realm of beliefs about what is possible. I've always believed intellectually in miracles and instant healing, but to start seeing it more often has challenged me to look at myself when I get in a tough spot and ask why I would hold onto anything less than wonderful in my life. I am challenging myself to stretch my beliefs and to step into an even larger reality. Why not? All dimensions exist at once. We can choose the one we focus on. I've had many miracles in my own life as a result.

Miracles seem to happen when we both thirst for them with our entire being, and when we are willing to let go of our attachment and obsession with the problem. They involve a willingness to either receive the miracle or to be open to anything else that might be in our highest good. If we detach from the outcome, we actually let go of the problem, the solution, and everything in between and we open ourselves up to all possibilities. God will give us what is truly best for our soul. Sometimes that means getting what you want. Sometimes that means not getting what you want, but learning so you can have far more than you want.

For example, I am pre-menopausal, and while this might be too much information, sometimes we women bleed a lot during this phase. A few months ago that was happening and so I put in a Braco DVD and simply said, "OK God, if you can work through this to help me please do, but if I need to go through this, then give me the strength." I focused on feeling good, adopted an attitude of "what is perfect for me will be," and watched a favorite segment of the DVD. Suddenly heat shot like lightning into my abdomen and within seconds the bleeding stopped and my energy returned. Another time I got my stomach all knotted up because I stuffed some feelings, and when I prayed for my miracle healing, instead of having an instant fix, the emotions I had repressed came out in a flood of tears and then my entire body relaxed. We don't always get what we want instantly, but we do get what we need!

So when you want your miracles, try this prayer... "Dear God please (whatever you want), or if I have to go through this give me the strength." "Whatever is perfect for me will be!" Then let go and trust that what is best in the big picture will happen. You'll either get your miracle or something better through the current experience than you might have anticipated!

Have a miraculous week!
I love you all,

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Giving for Joy

I like to give and always have. When my parents had opened all their presents at Christmas, I would go in the basement and find things they already owned to wrap and give them. I just liked the feeling of having something to share. As a child, I liked to make people laugh and smile. I still do!

Over the years in my early adulthood, however, I learned, as many of us did, to give because I thought I "should." I thought it made me a good person. I thought it would make people like me. So I gave and gave and gave. I gave thousands of hours of my time on the phone in my early psychic career, even when I was dead tired and not in the mood. I gave thousands of dollars to men I dated in my thirties, unconsciously trying to help them be nicer to me and happier in their own lives, even when they weren't doing their part. I gave my time, my heart, and my energy because I thought I could save, fix, heal, and inspire others. The angels told me that was manipulative. It crushed me when they said this. "I'm not a manipulative person", I argued. "I'm generous." "No you are not manipulative in general," they answered, "and you truly are generous. However, when you give with the hope it will change someone else, that is a subtle form of manipulation. It is not a true gift." I cried for hours until I grasped the truth of their message and the love behind it! They were trying to help me see that I needed to know I was "good" already. I didn't need to try to fix, save, or inspire others unless it came from my own joy. They were, even with such a difficult message, unburdening me of the need to give when I didn't truly feel like giving.

Over the years the angels have impressed upon me that honest giving is beautiful, while giving in the hopes of getting something back is really not the highest vibration. Neither is giving to feel like a good person. "You already are," they reminded me. Little by little I came to understand that true giving comes from a feeling of fullness, a desire to delight someone, a need from deep within my soul to share the blessings I feel I have received. And this kind of giving feels so good in the moment I give, that I often forget what I have given people! Sometimes they don't thank me, but it doesn't matter. Sometimes they don't make use of my gifts, but that doesn't matter either. I have shared love with another soul and its not about the stuff, but about letting them know that someone thought about them, cared about them, loved them. This is the nature of God. A few years ago a poem came through me, that describes this love that longs to flow through me. You can read it here if you like.

So as you contemplate what to give whom this lifetime, maybe you don't even need to think too much. Maybe instead you can give when it gives you joy, knowing this is the movement of God. My friends and I are funny about birthdays now. We don't care if we celebrate on the day. Sometimes we do, sometimes we don't. Sometimes the gifts are shared months later. Sometimes if we're lean in our lives, we just share our good thoughts. Giving has become a true joy in my life now, not an obligation. There is truly nothing like feeling the love of God flow through you, in any way that appears!

Saturday, October 05, 2013

Others affect but don't control you

I have been affected by the decisions of others many times in my life, as we all have. Some of you have heard this story. Years ago, I dated a man who ran off with $2000 that he owed me. I let him go but was carrying the burden of feeling like there were a million other things I needed that money for. I tried to put it behind me, but in truth was feeling lack. I went on a hike and prayed, "God how do I make more money?" Forgive your ex-boyfriend they told me. I got irate. "I'm not talking about him! I need to make more money." They persisted until finally they lovingly but strongly told me I was making him my God. I was blaming him for my lack, instead of turning to the true source of all abundance. He may have taken from me, but I was forgetting the loving Presence of the One who could give back. They were right. I contacted him the next day and said something to the effect of, "I forgive you the debt you owe me. If you have a conscience you can explain it to God at the end of your life but I'm letting go of all ties with you." It felt SO freeing. Surprisingly, I got a check in the mail from him the next week. I think I was the only woman he ever paid back. Additionally, God gifted me with wonderful new class ideas and blessings in so many forms.

Likewise a few years ago a dear one in my life went through a breakdown and projected quite a bit of pain onto me. For awhile I allowed it and tried to "help" but after it started affecting my health, the angels again lovingly and firmly told me to let go of the unhealthy dance. I did so. It wasn't easy. I felt guilty for awhile. But later I heard that this soul ended up growing because of my decision, and I immediately began to feel healthy and happy once again. I could have looked back and felt victimized and upset, because in truth I deserved kinder treatment, but instead, I was able to see the pain that caused this interaction, to let go, and to turn back to God for my joy. New friendships formed, and I am happier than I've ever been. If God's love leaves you in the form of one who is no longer resonant with your heart, God's love will appear in another more perfect for who you are now. After all, whether people realize what they are made of or not, we are all the many faces of this love.

We do have choice. We can allow others to continue to affect us long after their choices are made, or we can turn to God once again and ask that this Love fix our lives, our hearts, our bodies, minds, and souls. As the angels always remind me, "Ann! God moves the stars in the heavens and turns the seasons! He can certainly manage your life." This always makes me smile. How can we even imagine that we have to handle anything alone?

So this week, try to see where you give others your power to be happy, healthy, abundant, etc., and try to turn back to God again and again and give that power to its rightful source. Even if someone cuts you off in traffic, you can not to give away your joy. That is between you and God alone!