Saturday, February 23, 2013

Love those in pain

I am, without question, a deeply empathic soul. When I am not consciously "tuned out" I can look at someone in a crowd and feel them. I can think of someone miles away and experience their emotional energy field. It is both my gift and my challenge. I have had to work very hard to learn to feel and acknowledge my clients' pain while at the same time staying in a space of God's love. Usually I can do this.

This week however, when a woman I love and respect wrote to tell me her husband had died suddenly in his sleep, I couldn't help but fall into the depths of the grief she was feeling. I knew I had to get out of it so I could help her so I let myself do the human thing, grabbed my towels and had a good sob, but then started praying. "God let me be your love for this beautiful soul. Let me help her through this. Let me be strong for her." And soon I was filled with a love and compassion so deep that I was able to check in on her husband and relay a message. It was so hard not to feel the sorrow for a fellow human being going through such an intenesly painful situation, and yet I knew I must get myself back into that space of love if I was to be of service.

Likewise, I have several people I know who are going through tough times right now. I love them deeply but rather than feeling sad for them, I spend time every night allowing myself to be filled with God's love and then directing that light to them. I picture them happy, healthy, prosperous and whole because I know if I hold that vision for them, I can be of greater service, than if I focus on their pain. I am compassionate, caring, and understanding when we talk, but I do my best to stay in a space of love.

When I first started to really understand this principle, I almost felt as if I had lost my compassion and my ability to care. I had always associated "care" with "keeping misery company." The angels once said to me, "Ann you will see that you are able to care more deeply, when you seem not to care as much." It took years to really get that. What they meant is that I needed to care about loving those going through tough times, not pitying them in their pain. I am now able to sit with people going through the unthinkable and to love them through it. I am able to look through God's eyes and see another's strengths and capabilities even when they can't. And I am not in a space of suffering with them. I am, instead, with them, offering love and deep compassion. I am offering a way out of the pain, not keeping them company in it.

So if someone you love is suffering, try not to stay in the pain with them. Instead be there for them as a force of love, very much as a little child needs a loving mother or father to run to when they are in pain. You can be that figure that says simply to them, "Its going to be OK. You are going to get through this. I believe in you. I love you."

Love, after all, is the mightiest force in the universe, and certainly the greatest healer.

Saturday, February 16, 2013

Share the light

Years ago the angels made this point in a reading in a very humorous way. They said quite simply, "If someone is in quicksand, isn't it far more effective to wait on firm ground for when they are ready for a hand out, rather than jumping in with them and letting them stand on your head, while you both sink?" I had to laugh. When I was a kid, my little friend convinced me to put on my brand new Christmas boots, and go play in the mud in an area behind our house where new homes were being constructed. So there we were on Christmas day – two little teenage girls in our brand new boots – walking behind our development, when my friend began to sink in the mud. It had rained for a week and part of the area that had been dug up for the new construction had indeed turned to quicksand. She started to panic, because the more she struggled, the more she sank. Soon she was knee deep in wet Virginia clay that kept sucking her in deeper.

Using my teenage logic (Consequences? What consequences?) I promptly jumped in to try to push her out. I began to sink too. Luckily the hole wasn't that deep, only about two and a half feet,nonetheless, the more we tried to push each other out the deeper we sank. Finally we did the teenage unthinkable thing, and slid out of our boots, until we could climb up and out of the mud pit, ruining all our clothes along the way. The boots were finally retrieved and we were so muddy we couldn't even knock on the door when we went home. Our muddy socks squeaked in our muddy boots, as we stood near my back window and screamed until we were noticed! My dad took pity on us, let us in the garage and brought us blankets to change under. The clothing, boots, and blankets met the hose before the washing machine. Needless to say, I learned firsthand that hopping into quicksand doesn't do a bit of good.

So what the angels are saying is that the sad don't help the sad. The angry don't help the angry. The prejudiced don't help the prejudiced. We can only stop the vibration of hate if we refuse to get sucked into it. Last week when I had to face some very hateful souls, I knew how easy it would be to get and stay enraged. Instead I did what I always do. I let myself be human first and had a very private hissy. Then, when that was out of the way I prayed. I sat with God. "Let me see these people through your eyes. Let me have compassion." I meant it, but it wasn't easy. From there I was able to pray for them. Whenever someone is trying to anger me through their own angry or hateful vibration, I think of that scene in Star Wars when Darth Vader is trying to convert Luke to the dark side, "Use your anger," he tells Luke. "It'll make you more powerful." Luke refuses, opting to risk death rather than joining the dark side. I agree. I'd rather die than be mired in hatred, which is truly a death of the truth within one's self.

So when someone upsets you, let yourself be human. Work your own upset through in private. Vent, journal and shred (my favorite technique), punch pillows, exercise, or do what you must to work the energy through. If something saddens you, cry. I cry into towels when I am sad. Forget the Kleenex. They're too small. I bawl like a baby. But I let these emotions pass through me. I don't feed them, and welcome them to stay. I pray like crazy sometimes in my more human moments. "God help me see with your eyes. Help me feel compassion. Help me walk a higher path. Help me live in the truth of your love." These are good prayers, and they are always answered if you are sincere.

I see people who have been abused, who work very hard not to let the ones who were mired in pain and hurt them, ruin their lives. They work to live in the truth of God's love for them, rather than living in the lies of the perpetrator's pain. It isn't easy, but I have seen people rise above the most unthinkable conditions in their lives to move into joy. It takes work, dedication, and a willingness to say, "I am made of more than this." It can be done.

So this week, when something or someone invites you to keep them company in their misery, instead do your best to let yourself have your human emotions, but then keep them company, if you chose, in the light of your love. It feels much better, and does a whole lot more good. And that after all leads to a much happier and more purposeful existence.

Saturday, February 09, 2013

Love for hatred

When I channeled last week's message about having patience with others I had no idea that within days I would be tested to do the same. I stumbled across a petition asking people to shut down a facebook site dedicated the hatred and massacre of wolves. Before signing it, I went to check it out. My stomach turned, my heart sank, and I felt sickened by what I saw. My issue wasn't with hunting or population control. I have met hunters who are more in tune with the natural universe and more respectful of animals they hunt than those who put meat on our grocery store shelves. My issue was with the blood lust and the blatant displays of hatred, brutality, and love of torture. It was beyond sad. I didn't hate these people. I wanted to cry for their lost souls.

Without thinking, I shared an ecological opinion on the their page and was promptly told I was a stupid, uneducated, idiot. I realized that nothing would come of such conversations so I just apologized and told the man I'd pray for him. He said he didn't need prayers and reiterated how stupid I was. "Coincidentally" it was the second anniversary of my wolf dog Bruno's passing into heaven. Others on the hateful page saw my post about him on facebook and used that as an opportunity to call me stupid, to tell me I didn't know the difference between a wolf and a dog, and lash out to share their pain with me as well. I knew it wasn't personal. They didn't know either one of us. They just needed a target. I backed off entirely and refused to engage.

The angels have taught me that there is never a reason ever to dance with the devil - that force that seeks to create chaos and disruption through the hatefulness of others. In fact the angels woke me up in the middle of the night and told me to erase every mention of them from my page and take my own comments off theirs before their argument with me escalated. There was no need to propagate further pain and anger. I did so, and tried to let it go but the sadness still haunted me.

Funny enough a few weeks ago a dear lady wrote to ask how the angels could speak of seeking happiness when there was such pain in the world. I had responded that I felt it my duty to keep myself in a higher space so I could better serve others in pain. I knew this was a great opportunity to practice what I preach at deeper levels, and so I began to pray fervently for the upliftment of all those mired in such hatred. I prayed so hard in fact, that I broke out in a sweat and for a time being lost track of my body as I felt God's love like a river flowing through me out to all those I was praying for. The sadness for the humans left me as I felt God's outpouring of love, but one more image haunted me. I couldn't shake one particular picture of a tortured wolf. I couldn't figure out why. I know the other side is beautiful. I know that whatever we endure, we are released from pain the minute we go into the light. But since I couldn't shake this feeling of sadness, I asked God t o step in and help me get back into the truth of Divine Love.

The tears began to pour from me. I felt myself sobbing, looking for the spirit of this wolf, apologizing for the sub-human hatred and violence of those who had felt it necessary to not only kill but torture him. Suddenly I felt my spirit slipping back out of my body as I sometimes do when channeling, and out of my own mouth I heard howls, yaps, and the tortured cries of a dying wolf. I suddenly found myself in spirit with this being as he died. I was sending him love, assisting him out of the body. I heard his final yaps and gasps escape my own lips and then suddenly, I felt the glory of a soul returning into the light and instantly I felt a blissful peace. Suddenly in the visionary realms of spirit, I saw him reunited with his pack. This time my body was silent. The tears dried. All I heard in spirit now were the howls and yaps of celebration as the pack joined together in the light. As if on cue, Bruno, my "deceased" wolf dog appeared, looking pretty proud of him self. I knew he had orchestrated this. He has always been an amazing shaman spirit.

So when you encounter things in the world that are almost too hard to bear, remember that we can always add love. We can always pray for those who are hurting... and even more needed, we can pray for those who are hurtful. We can pray for the release of spirits that have been brutalized. We can, through our willingness to avoid hating and joining the miserable in their misery, create a vibration that is higher, happier, and more uplifted in this world. We may not ever stop the world's pain and brutality, but even if we help uplift or release one soul, then, in the words of Emily Dickinson, "We have not lived in vain."

I will continue to choose to serve the world through my joy and in those moments I fall into the darker spaces, I will share my light until it raises me up once again... and God willing, others with it.

Saturday, February 02, 2013

Being patient & powerful

We had a beautiful rain here in Arizona last weekend. I loved it. My dog did not. She got me up at 2am and then at 5am again to go outside, only to realize that she didn't really want to go out in the rain. I tried to coax her. I went out and beckoned her. I stood in the dark downpour with my raincoat on, holding up an umbrella and called to her. She looked at me and ran back to bed. I knew what was coming, so I put pee pee pads under her and waited for the inevitable. Sure enough within the hours I was doing laundry… again.

In these moments it is not easy to be patient. However, I love my dog, and I knew from what the angels have taught me that unless I had compassion for myself first, I was not going to feel too compassionate towards her. So I loaded up the laundry, went into the second bedroom, shut the door, buried my face in a pillow, and bawled. It wasn't the most evolved behavior, but after little sleep and too much wash, it was the best I could do. Lucy tried to follow me around, but I wasn’t in the mood. "Go to bed," I told her calmly and firmly. She looked at me, felt the no nonsense energy and walked herself into the bedroom for a nap. I was able to do a quick meditation, grab breakfast and get myself back in a loving space. We ended up having a very nice day.

Being patient and tolerant does not mean we let others treat us badly. Caesar Milan, the dog whisperer for example is a very patient and calm person but he is also firm and commanding. The angels love that show! They got so excited the first time I watched it. “That’s it!” they were saying in my head! “Calm assertive! Loving but strong! That’s what humans need to learn when they don’t like another’s behavior.” Likewise, "Super Nanny" - the perfect babysitter - is very patient and loving, but also very firm in her insistence on good behavior. There are times in life for speaking up and not tolerating bad behaviors is appropriate. However, if we do so after first accepting our own feelings and being patient with ourselves, then we can be firm from a loving and powerful place, rather than a place of helpless frustration.

I will never forget one interaction with a hotel that charged me $600 for catering an event. No food was provided and according to the contract water was free. It was clearly their mistake. I was upset when I found out I was charged because I needed the credit on my card for other expenses. I allowed myself my feelings in private, then calmed down and called the hotel, assuming that it was an honest mistake. The local manager promised to send me a refund and did not. After several interactions over a few months and no check, I patiently reported him to the better business bureau and called their corporate headquarters. The local manager was furious! He had been caught in his bad behavior. He called me up and screamed at me. He told me that he was going to pay me but I hadn’t been patient enough. I just listened calmly and asked him when I could expect the check. If I had tried to interact with that rage it would have been a mess for us both. I had been patient with my own anger so I was able to be powerful, loving, and calm in the face of his. I got the check the following week.

Rather than having patience looking a certain way in your life, realize it is an internal state of being where we first accept ourselves, as we are, and then from that space, we can allow others to be themselves, while still figuring out the healthiest way to dance with them… if at all. If we are truly to love our neighbors as ourselves, we must first love ourselves.

So this week, be patient with yourself. Allow yourself your own feelings. And then see if that doesn't make it easier to be patient with others as well. It won't make you weak. Instead it will help you come from a more powerful place of love, compassion, and clarity.