Saturday, March 30, 2013

Resurrecting joy!

Sometimes as I channel the angel message for the week I feel distinct energies. As I channeled this one I felt like flowers wanted to push forth from my depths out into the light! It was indeed an energy of blossoming. It was beautiful.

This morning when I woke up, the angels asked me the same question they asked above. What will you allow to die today, Ann? The first thing that popped into my mind was, "Worrying about how I'm going to pack in everything I want to do today." So I let that minor worry die and proceeded to ignore my schedule, my to-do-list, my emails, etc. and to follow my heart. I cooked dinners for the remainder of the week while still half awake in my pajamas. It went so quickly! I got my doggie ready for the day a bit later than usual. She loved sleeping in! I forgot that I wanted to participate in a teleconference and went to the gym to work out instead. It felt great!

The plumber came to fix a leaky faucet and told me I needed new parts for the leaky shower. Scratch the plans again! I was soon guided to a hardware store other than my usual one where the part I needed was in stock. Within fifteen minutes I had the wrench out and the plumber's tape and was fixing the remaining problem. Still I didn't feel like doing my newsletter, so instead I ate a great dinner on the patio, inhaling the intoxicating scent of fresh orange blossoms and enjoying the coolness of the night air. My dog was smiling. My belly was full. My senses were thrilled. And suddenly, the angels started talking and the newsletter was written with ease. There were more errands and tasks scattered throughout the day, and as I look back everything and more that I needed got done, all with grace and ease. Its only 8pm as I write this. I may still have time to enjoy a girly pleasure and paint my toes :) I am glad I let the worry and need for control " die" today. It made welcome room for God's love to flow gracefully through my life.

There are always thoughts, habits, repetitive patterns, etc., that can "die" in our lives to make room for better. There are things we must fix or get rid of. There are situations that once served us which no longer do. There are areas of resistance that we must give up in order to do what we truly love. There are complaints that must be released in order to create what we really want. Death of these no-longer useful patterns can be a good thing. It truly does make room for a new, more loving, and glorious life! Think about it. What will you allow to die today within you, so that you can resurrect more light in your own life?

Have a blessed week & to those of you who celebrate these holidays, Happy Easter and a belated Happy Passover! Can't resist the little Easter joke... Some Bunny Really Loves you!

Saturday, March 23, 2013

Trust God within

I have learned that when I trust the signals within me, life flows smoothly. God loves all of us and we are all guided, but we have to stop second guessing ourselves. I see this in action in my life all the time. The last time I was outdoors in Sedona, I was busy enjoying my day when all of the sudden I got a very clear feeling that I needed to get in the car and start driving home. It was unmistakable. One minute I was paying attention to the blue sky and fresh air, the next it felt like a magnet was drawing me back to the car. I hesitated for just a few minutes because I really wanted to stay. However, when I checked in again, there was no denying the sensation. I got in the car and got on the highway.

Traffic was magically easy until I was just north of Phoenix. Suddenly, ahead of me a camper began to spew white smoke and swerve. The cars in front of me began to brake and swerve. By some miracle the camper got off the highway and I stayed on it. I could see traffic beginning to pile up behind me and knew this was going to be one of those long traffic jams caused by drivers who need to slow down and gawk at an accident. I thanked God that I had started home when I did. Had I listened without any hesitation at all, I would have missed the entire drama. When God warns you, there is no fear, very little thought, and only a strong sense of "I need to do this now."

The same principles apply when you are wondering whether or not you can trust other people. Years ago I was one of those individuals who trusted everyone else instead of trusting the voice of God within myself. I gave everyone the benefit of the doubt and saw only the good in them. I ignored the rest. I saw the darkness, but filtered it out because I didn't want to see it. I spent most of my thirties learning – the hard way – to trust myself. This lesson, in the late nineties, was particularly impactful.

I had decided to spend a week in Sedona for a birthday vacation alone. I love quiet time with God and nature. Nothing fills my soul as dearly as a warm sunshine, flowing water, the smell of the trees, or the blue sky above. So I was slightly irritated when a man interrupted my meditation on a mesa to hit on me. He seemed nice enough. His resume seemed impressive. But my gut felt tight and unsettled, clearly telling me this would not be a fun experience. So when he invited me for tea after my meditation I politely declined. Still irritated, I went back to my hotel room an wrote a spontaneous poem entitled "Find Yourself. " That should have been my first clue. Nonetheless, I kept running into him in subsequent days, and by the third time I talked myself out of my initial feelings and agreed to go out with him. Thus began one of the most painful lessons I have ever created.

I drove north twice a week and turned a blind eye to the fact that although he claimed loyalty, he cheated on me the minute I was out of town. I felt it in my stomach, and didn't want to feel it. I saw behaviors I didn't like but didn't want to see them. I made excuses for him and reasoned away my feelings. I started to feel bad about myself. I had never worried about my looks but I started to feel ugly. When the truth finally came out, he dumped me and took off on a trip with another woman the very next day. I cried. I punched pillows. For months, I prayed with my entire being to be rid of the anger. Almost a year later, when nothing else had worked, the angels finally sent me to seek him out and ask for an apology. I don't know why but I was terrified. This man, in my not-yet-evolved opinion, had stolen my innocence and trust. He had lied, cheated, and abused my good nature. I later found out that he had dabbled in sorcery and was sending me some pretty nasty energy. "God is with you," the angels told me. "Now go do this. You will understand later"

I walked into his shop, looked him in the eye, and simply said, "Remember me?" He looked startled. "You lied to me. You cheated on me. If you had just been honest I could have made an informed decision. I can't make healthy decisions for myself, when people lie. It was wrong. I want an apology." Surprisingly, my voice was calm. I felt the angels in my heart. My eyes locked with his. Suddenly as he was apologizing, I started to feel like I was spinning. I was looking into his eyes but I knew in that instant they were mine too. I was not asking him for an apology. I was asking the part of me that had lied to myself for an apology. We were one in that instant. He was just an out-picturing of me. In that instant I felt nothing but love for him. I thanked him, drove away, then parked the car, and allowed tears of relief to flow freely. He was forgiven, but more importantly, so was I.

When you are wondering who and what to trust, distance yourself from everything for a bit. If you can, get outside or at least find a restful place where you can be alone, away from other influences. Take a few deep breaths, and simply ask, "What do I feel in my heart of hearts?" Don't ask, "What do I think? What do others think? What should I think? What should I do?" but rather, "What does my heart feel." Here I am not talking about our resistance but rather our true feelings. Last weekend when I was rushing around, I did want to rest. I got the guidance to rest. I ignored it and learned.

What you feel in your hearts of hearts in each moment – for that moment – is your guidance from God. Trust that. Then you won't have to worry about whether or not you should trust anyone else. It will become a point unworthy of discussion. You will simply know what is right for you. When I trust the loving voice of God within, my life is pure magic! You have that wisdom too.

Saturday, March 16, 2013

Will for love

Sometimes I have no clue why the angels write what they do. Other times I feel as if I am getting a loving lecture. This was one of those times. I got up last weekend so excited! I had two whole days with nothing planned. It was a perfect rainy day and I was really looking forward to staying inside and writing. I set the alarm clock late, looking forward to a delicious morning of sleeping in, sipping hot tea under piles of polar fleece, and progress on the book. Instead I was awakened by the sounds of Lucy, my little elderly Labrador, running through the house. She didn't quite make it to the door. And then to make it even more of an adventure she walked through her trail of stinky stuff and tracked it throughout the entire house as I ran after her trying to guide her to the back door. What a game in her mind! Mom is playing! She's chasing me! Never mind that her legs can barely walk at times, she was hopping all over like a happy bunny rabbit!

Within minutes, 15 non skid mats, 20 towels, and 7 pee pee pads had been soiled. That translated into a marathon day of laundry and disinfecting half the house. Lucy was feeling awesome. I was not quite as thrilled! She took one look at my dejected face and began to pout and glare at me, wondering why on earth I wasn't sharing her bliss. To ward off total frustration, I prayed to see her through God's eyes until I felt better and she stopped glaring and smiled once again.

Needless to say my peaceful day of writing was not going to happen. With a sigh of seeming surrender, I asked, "OK God what do you want me to do?" "Sit and rest between loads of wash," came the answer, "and nap in between cleaning." That wasn't what I wanted to hear! We rarely get rain in Phoenix and when we do I love it! It inspires me. I feel creative. I didn't want to "waste" another day off sleeping to make up for doggie wake ups and messes. I got willful, and not in a way that was aligned with my body or God's guidance.

Instead I pushed through the day, doing 16 hours of laundry and a lot of cleaning. I did have a little fun with photography which felt amazing, and Lucy and I did have some snuggle time, but in general by late afternoon I was tired. I was still zipping around the house trying to get things done when I tripped and came down hard on my left foot (yes left side = feminine energy which I was ignoring!) It bruised so badly that time on the couch was no longer negotiable. Rest was going to be enforced the rest of the weekend.

God didn't trip me up. I did. If I would have listened to my body and guidance, I would have avoided injury, rested, and had a totally clean house by the end of Saturday which would have given me the energy to do all I wanted to accomplish on Sunday. Instead I pushed through my day and got injured.

I may "trip up" spiritually at times, but luckily I got the point quickly! The minute I surrendered, I felt better. I propped the foot up, napped, did a little art, and even got this newsletter written. I used my willpower not to beat myself up, but rather to embrace all that was good about this adventure. I enjoyed the beautiful day with my sweet Lucy and felt inspired once again. I asked for human and Divine help and received it in great measure. In fact, on Sunday night, I got my miracle. I was just sitting feeling grateful for a day of rest, for the beings in my life, and for the love of God. In this space of graititude, my mind travelled back in time into the recent experience with Braco where I went into Divine Bliss.

With that thought, my third eye began to pulsate so strongly I could barely keep my eyes open. Over time I have come to understand this is my invitation into other realms. I surrendered, shut my eyes, and was immediately transported in spirit into beautiful realities with white stone buildings, blue green pools, and gardens beyond description. I felt the most exquisite sweetness in my heart and a blissful buzzing throughout my being. I don't know how long it lasted, but when I "came to" my foot was miraculously better. I still can't walk on it perfectly but the swelling was instantaneously gone and the pain as well. All I had to do was use my free will to get back in alignment with a more loving reality. In the blissful currents of love and grace anything is possible.

Our will is indeed powerful. With a single choice we can align with love, or we can stubbornly resist it. Trust me, it is much easier to align with love :)!! And when you don't, love yourself through it anyway and you'll get back on on track in no time!

Have a blessed week
I love you all!

Saturday, March 09, 2013

The joys of listening to love

Being a rather independent soul, the notion of "obeying" anyone or anything used to conjure up images of being controlled. It once inspired rebellious notions of, "I will listen to myself thank you very much." The angels, ever patient with human notions, explained to me that in obeying God, I would only being obeying my own design, my heart of hearts, and the guidance that would lead me to an amazing life. Over the years I have come to love and appreciate and love this wisdom.

Take my book, "Love is the River: Living in the Flow of Divine Grace" as an example. I worked on it for several years on and off, writing and rewriting it as it rewrote my life. I had to learn what I was sharing before the book could be released. Then one weekend the message and the desire to lock myself in my office came strongly. I did so and thirty hours later finished the manuscript. I put it in the car because I had a notion to do so, brought it to an event, and the rest is history. I had a "coincidenta"l meeting with Liz Dawn who owns Mishka Productions and within a week was asked to speak among famous authors. "How did you get in with them?" I was asked by many. I obeyed God and my own heart, was the only honest answer. Heaven arranged the rest.

This past week I had another example of the divine bliss that comes from obeying the heart. Several of my clients and friends, knowing my love of Karunamayi and Panache Desai - souls who beam God's love in large measure – wrote to tell me that Braco, another transmitter of Divine light was going to be in town. I had heard of him over the years but the timing had never been right to attend one of his events. Once again his scheduled date in Phoenix was on a work day and I felt no inspiration to cancel my clients so I chalked it all up to divine timing. Imagine my surprise the next day, while getting a haircut when my hairdresser brought up the fact that she had gone to see Braco. "You are the fifth person who told me about him," I shared with her, "but I was working again yesterday and it didn't feel right to go." "He's here again today," she told me. "You should go." She was kindly insistent. I was torn. I had set aside the rest of the day to write, something that had once again inspired my passion. A the same time, I did feel a tug to go to one of this man's events. I quieted my mind dropped in my heart and simply said, "OK God, what do you want for me." "Go," I heard. "OK," I answered. I left my dear hairdress er with hair still wet and hopped in the car immediately.

On the hour long drive to the event, the sun poured in through the windshield of my car and burnt into my solar plexus with a heat I have come to recognize as the touch of God. At the same time the car in front of me glared a perfect sunburst pattern into my third eye causing that energy center to buzz like crazy. I passed a car with the license plate "FREE2BE." This was obviously going to be fun! I pulled into the parking lot of the hotel and without thought or reading a sign, found the event by following the energy. I was just in time.

Each of these souls who transmits operates differently. Braco simply allows the power of God to look at you through his eyes. No words, no touch, no readings, just pure love. Many people experience healing miracles in his presence. Although my body could use a few miracles after some health adventures the past few years, I had no inspiration to ask for anything. "God do whatever you want with me! You brought me here." was my simple happy prayer. I have come to learn and trust that what the Creator wants for me is almost always better than what I could want for myself.

As we waited, I talked to the lady next to me about her family and told her I'd pray for them too. There was a unity in this room that was palpable and an expectancy that was fueled by the hopes of all those present. Finally, Braco came into the room - a simple man with a purity of energy that was absolutely radiant and beautiful. As he gazed at the crowd, I felt myself locked into the eyes of God staring through the gentle soul. I felt my inner voice suddenly say, "I receive your love on behalf of mother earth." It was my soul's voice, the I-Am behind the I-Ann that made that decision. All I can say, is "Whoa! Go God!" What a Divine intent that was! Talk about bliss! I could no longer see Braco. Before my very eyes, he transformed into a being of white and gold light and I saw countless faces of the masters transposed over his own. With eyes open, I saw beams of sunshine radiating out from him to all in the crowd. The light was alive and it was reaching out touching everyone in the crowd. It was the light I see on the "other side" when I talk with people who have transitioned into heaven. It was the same light I see with my "inner eyes" as I guide classes in meditations. It reached out with tenderness and touched everyone, filling the room, fueling the sparks of Divine light in the hearts of all those present and drawing their own light forth. Everyone in the room became radiant in this glow as we melted into One.

The moments of presence just kept getting better. Waves of bliss and divine childlike joy washed over me and filled me as I worked very hard to focus on two human eyes blazing through a sea of gold and white. There were no words, no thoughts, but just God staring back at God through two different forms, experiencing the absolute bliss of being able to experience itself this way. My soul was so filled with joy that it burst out of my body and danced in the tendrils of light weaving throughout the room. I know that if I didn't have so many limiting thoughts about being human, my body would have levitated. As is, my body rose effortlessly until I was on my toes and balanced delicately in that position. That's when my brain kicked in and kept me on earth!

I thought that was enough and was prepared to go home but again love beckoned. No thought was required. As I left the room I knew I was staying for one more session. This time the thought that arose within me was, "I used to do this. Bring it on God! Let me touch others this way." It all suddenly seemed easy to drop into that heart space and share. I do this in readings at times, not by my choice, but rather when the energy decides to flow through me. I knew it would now happen more often. Truly in the week following, the waves of heat went through me to others. Tears came to their eyes as they felt the love of God touch their hearts. It is bliss to share this beauty.

So when you get the urge to do something, even when it doesn't make sense, doesn't fit your plans or preconceived notions, be open to life. Be open to possibilities you may not have even considered. A dear sweet client who listened to her heart's urge to go eat dinner out late one night met someone who bought the house she wanted to sell. A friend who exited a nightclub she didn't really want to be at with met her future husband who was standing outside of the one next door. As I wrote this last sentence, I got an incoming email from a photographer friend who was inspired to create his own book to showcase his work and, as a result, has just received a possibility of career opportunity that he never could have imagined for himself.

This is how God works. A loving urge is planted in your heart. You obey it or ignore it. And if you listen, the power that knows all 7.2 billion people and how they can most lovingly interact is working on your behalf. I'd rather obey a Love that loves me, rather than obey all the conditioning that seeks simply to keep me safe.

Obey your heart of hearts. With a childlike innocence, reach for joy. This type of obedience to love will connect you with the indescribable magic in life, opens you to possibilities you may never have considered, and draw you into streams of grace. The real YOU is actually in control when you obey Love. Try it out this week... miracles await.

Have a blessed week
I love you all!

ps - Braco is coming back to Phoenix May 14 and 15th - I will put out a note to this newsletter when more info is on the website. It is only $8 for a session - the cost of two Starbucks or a large dose of Divine Love in a different form :)!!! Save the date if you are so inspired!

Saturday, March 02, 2013

Being light / reaching for light

I am relieved that the angels elaborated on the topic of assisting from a space of love this week. Last week a lady wrote me, feeling very sad and upset. She felt that the angels were suggesting we abandon people who were in darker spaces. I understood her perspective and sent her a lot of love and prayed that her heart would be soothed. She was in a lot of pain. However, that is not the angels' message at all. They never abandon anyone, nor would they ask us to ignore our loving hearts that seek to comfort, soothe, heal, or assist another. They simply don't want us becoming angry with the angry, sad with the sad, and so on. It isn't always easy to stay in a space of love, but after nearly two decades of working with my clients and their angels, I have seen first hand, so many times, the healing power of unconditional love and acceptance.

I think at times we struggle, trying to use our minds to figure out how we can love ourselves and one another, particularly if you find yourself in a challenging situation or in a difficult relationship. I have heard many parents tell me that they love their children dearly, but were ready to scream at times because they hadn't had a moment's rest. In this case, love for themselves was required because they were running on empty. The angels always advise them to seek out some help, take a bit of time off, or more deeply look at their need to make everything "perfect" and see if that wasn't the real reason that they were suffering.

I hear the same from many caretakers of the elderly. Even caring for my sweet older dog Lucy can be a challenge. When I am able to give her a lot of attention she snuggles, smiles, and prances like a happy girl. However, on days I work with clients, especially when I have to run out to the store to get us more food afterwards, she pouts and glares at me. I can handle lack of sleep, loads of laundry, or any amount of work with love in the house, but when this little being who has become the center of my life sends me emotional daggers, it is harder to feel warm and loving! I've prayed hard over this. At times I didn't have a clue how I could balance taking care of myself with taking care of her. The angels always reminded me that taking care of myself IS taking care of her. And so I eat first, then feed her breakfast in bed. I sneak into the shower, then do her laundry. I fill up my soul with meditation and then I'm able to go hug and love her even if sh e's glaring at me. If I don't practice such self care we both suffer. When I do, I can love her whether or not she is being "lovable" in the traditional sense. She is, after all, an elderly pooch that is much like a little girl in need of attention. And if you can love someone and be kind even when they are not loving to you, it diffuses their bad mood or they just walk away and leave you alone. In either case, you are choosing to give yourself the gift of peace.

So when you find yourself wanting to help someone in pain, love them. If they will not accept your loving words or actions, bless them and let them have their moods, but be kind to yourself as well. Do not hold yourself back from joy if they choose to do so. You can ask how you can help. You can offer to help if it is authentic for you to do so. You can pray, send energy, bring meals, offer your talents, etc. Most people in a dark space really do want love and assistance. But if you run into a few every now and then who simply want to stay in their dark spaces, give them the space to do so, without judgment, without an attempt to control or change them, and with love for yourself as a loving being as well. This IS admittedly a fine line to walk - to love and hold space for someone who is not yet ready to receive it - and yet it feels so much better than when we stop loving.

And, if by some chance you are in a denser space and not yet ready to be out of it, as in the case of grief, which by its very nature must run its natural course, then tell those around you... "Thank you for trying to help but what I need now is simply to cry. I need time alone. I need you to just be with me while I cry." If you are mad and need to run it through you, be honest with those around you, "I need to vent, can you handle it without fixing me? I need to go exercise this and burn it off, would you go on a brisk walk with me and just listen?" If you are in a dark space and can avoid judging yourself and honestly ask for what you need from people willing and able to share, then you will find that you receive a lot of love. It is an act of self-love to be that honest.

I'm sending you all huge doses of light and love this week. The world is challenging at present, but we can and will be the light bulbs that illuminate the souls of those who are searching. And we are the ones who are searching we will know how to look for the light because we have seen it so clearly inside of ourselves.

Love you all!

PS - All the recent angel discussions have motivated me to pull out a book I nearly finished nine years ago and get it done!! Stay tuned! It is a huge project as always but it will be done this year!