Saturday, October 13, 2012

My light, not your dark

I drive frequently and am often amazed by how people in cars think it is ok to behave in ways they would never dare to exhibit in person. Rarely have I had someone in a long line in the grocery store rush up and come so close they could nearly push me into another, but it happens often in traffic. I have never had someone bypass me speeding on foot just to jump in line ahead of me, but it is a common occurrence on the road. And while such behaviors re irritating, the angels have taught me to either, bless the angry drivers or ignore them. I often do the sign of the cross over cars that speed past me at 90mph and pray that they don't kill anyone! And when a truck comes up so close behind me that I have nowhere to go, I turn up the radio and sing happy songs! I would change lanes if I could, but sometimes that isn't possible and so I am stuck choosing either to be irritated or to ignore the offensive driver. They might not like it, but I can at l east choose a more loving behavior.

These are a small examples. Often in my office, people are angry at someone in their lives who has been unthinkably cruel. They yell at me, but I know they’re just venting. The angels and I send them a lot of love while we are listening, because we know they are in a lot of pain.

It is harder to “turn the other cheek” when the anger is aimed at you in person, but it still works. Walk away or listen without response... and send love. I have listened to hurting souls target me with their pain, often attacking me personally. If I say anything at all I say, “I hear you and I'm sorry.” The apology doesn't come because I've done anything wrong. I am truly sorry that they are hurting. On occasion, I've said, “I'm a loving person and deserve kinder treatment,” but I have said it gently and without fail it has been heard.

The angels have taught me that angry people just want to be understood. They want someone to see and understand their pain. They want acknowledgment for what they have been through, or for you their point of view. Sometimes you are up for giving them this gift and other times you are not but the trick is to remain honest with yourself about what feels like the right response. For example, when people I care about are angry, I listen and try to understand. When people I don’t know attack me, I typically don’t respond. There are times I set a boundary. Just last week someone tagged me in an unkind post on Facebook, which mean her unkind post appeared on my page. While this soul had a right to her expression, I exercised my right to take it off my page. I have no desire to participate in the unkindnesses of this world and it was ok to say “no” to that type of thing.

So do your best not to engage in the unkindnesses of the world. Set boundaries and acknowledge your own right to exist in a loving space, and when you can't leave an unkind situation, either respond lovingly or remain silent.We can remain in our light no matter what is around us... and it sure feels better!

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