Saturday, May 23, 2009

Be who you are... without fear

I'm a grateful person. I give thanks for the smallest things like the smell of flowers on the breeze, a slight bit of relief when I'm tired, a sweet buzz of energy running through my hands. When my dogs smile at me I have waves of warm gratitude wash through my heart and when I'm able to help a client find peace, I give thanks for that too.

But when it comes to receiving thanks, I have had to learn a lot. Its been my experience with myself and hundreds of clients over the years that when we're doing what God set us up to do, we tend to downplay the gift, think its nothing to fuss over, and gloss over our own value.

The angels say if we could dig deep inside ourselves and share our God-given gifts with others, we would find greater abundance and create joyful businesses, and live lives imbued with grace. Even if you don't have to work, you will find great satisfaction in sharing the gifts God gave you in some fashion - perhaps with family and friends. It makes the world a better place.

Its so sad that we have a notion that you can't earn money or be of value doing what comes easily and naturally to you. I had to work at honing my abilities but I used to assume that my intuitive nature was 'common sense' and that I was just 'oversensitive.' I had no idea it would be of value to others. I thank God He chased me until I learned to trust the divine presence in my life. Over the years I have come to accept the fact that what comes naturally to me is of value to others. However, I had to wade through a lot of fear when I started in this profession. I was totally afraid of people's judgments. I hid behind a sign in the metaphysical bookstore where I started doing readings so that if any of my old engineering buddies walked by they wouldn't see me. When people asked what I do I would say, "Um I'm a consultant." Now I just own who I am, what I do, and come clean with people. They either love it or hate it, but I've accepted who I am.

I think this fear of judgment and fear that one's natural gifts and talents are 'nothing special' holds people back from really living their passions. Its sad that the stigma of 'starving artist' is heaped on so many talented souls who really CAN make a living doing what they love. The artists who make a living at it didn't let that stop them - they persevered. They shared their enthusiasm for their own work until they were contagious and the world caught on. If you can truly OWN the gift in what you love doing then you will project that enthusiasm and others will catch it. It DOES take perseverence to start a business doing what you love, or even if it isn't a business it takes courage to share your gifts with others. I taught one person classes and sat in the bookstore all day on the slowest day of the week, sometimes doing only one fifteen minute reading a day when I started - $6 after taxes and the bookstore's cut. It was terrifying. But something in me said, "Keep going." Better to be terrified doing what you love and to keep going and trust God than to return to a life that had no passion and no heart. To this day, looking back, I am not sure how I survived. True, I had an apartment and expenses that were much lower, but every month was a terrifying tight time, and yet God provided, somehow, always. It was worth it. I'm glad I faced those fears of financial ruin. I'm glad I kept going even when there was little reason. I'm glad the one person classes turned into five people, and twelve, then twenty, and more... I'm glad the one a day readings turned into packed days. It didn't happen overnight.

So if you love something, do it. Stop letting fear of failure, fear of judgment, and fear that you aren't special stop you. Do it on the side and work if you have to at another job to pay the bills. Do it because you love it. Share it with others and ask for donations, or charge and hold your head up high. Make the world a better place by sharing yourself - the real you - and watch how the world returns the love. Some won't. Some will judge, criticize, and do anything but support you. But there will also be those who come out of the woodwork, so to speak, to tell you how much they love what you do.

I got a huge dose of love this week from some friends who decided to remind me of how much I had done for them over the years. It had never sunk into my brain that just by being me, I had deeply affected their lives. I didn't think of anything I did as anything 'special' - it was just being who I am. You can 'just' be who you are too. And that is more than enough :)

This week be who you are. Share yourself or your talents with someone. And enjoy the beautiful echo that comes back in return.

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