Thursday, February 21, 2008

Resist panic and life flows...

I was concerned this week about finding time to do the newsletter and yet I had no desire to force it to happen sooner than it was ready to arrive. It is nearly impossible for me to schedule these since the angels choose when they want to channel them and nothing I can do to force them makes them happen sooner. So, when a client cancelled at the last minute, it was not a surprise that the angels were ready to dictate their segment.

I have taken their words to heart this year. I have been literally watching my thoughts carefully and the minute a negative thought comes in, I tell it, "Go to your room! You're not welcome in my consciousness anymore. That is not my truth! Go into the light or go away!" No matter what. There is always temptation to buy into our worries, fears, negativities, etc. We are human after all. Feelings are neutral, neither positive or negative; however thoughts can truly ruin our day.

This week the thoughts that I was banishing had to do with urgency. Tuesday, I had a full day of clients, couldn't keep up with the emails, found out the artwork on five CDs needed to be changed because the publisher changed its specifications, and was asked to provide a new photo for a DVD cover on my lunch break! For just a moment panic set in! There was no way I could accomplish everything everyone needed me to do timely fashion. I started to stress out, then truth struck - God does not require me to rush, feel stressed, or even 'accomplish' anything. I decided I would have to be behind on the emails, I could fix the CD artwork that night, and offered an alternative suggestion for the photo if it was needed immediately, or offered to take a new one the next day. Miraculously everything fell into place once again. So what if the photo used wasn't my best shot, or if the CD covers got updated later than I had hoped? The world didn't end, all I needed to accomplish got done, and everyone ended up happy.

I used to run around feeling stressed, hurried, worried, overworked and living in fear that if I didn't accomplish everything on my almighty to-do list my life would fall apart or I would be so hopelessly buried in work that I would never catch up. That became the reality I attracted - I never did catch up. I worked all the time, but never felt focused. Now I rush a lot less, get a lot more done, and have time to enjoy life too. I have cut back tremendously on things I used to think I had to do to be happy and as a result, I am happier. I focus more on my own priorities and am able to serve others in a better way. I know that God cares about us so much that we are not required to sacrifice any one of our precious present moments in pursuit of an imagined future.

Urgency is just fear wearing another mask. It is the fear that if we don't hurry up and get something done we'll fail to get what we want in the future. It says, "Rush, hurry, hurry or you may lose out." Of course we have deadlines to meet, bills to pay on time, and commitments in our job. However, so much of our urgency is self-created. If we run around in a panic about the future we attract all sorts of insanity. If however, we arrange our priorities in the moment by slowing down and asking, "What is truly important to me NOW?" then our future seems to unfold with grace.

Wednesday after work, it was important to me to get some fresh air. I started out in one direction but my heart wanted to go another way so I turned the car around and ended up at a local mountain park wearing shoes and clothes that were totally inappropriate for hiking. Nonetheless the air was fresh, the clouds were scudding across the sky, bringing in a storm, and the desert was practically electrified with life. I got out of the car, grabbed my keys and camera and started to walk a little way along the trail. Pretty soon I got lost in the moment. It was so beautiful! I had to go a step further, and then a little further. I wasn't thinking about where I was going or how long I would walk. I wasn't thinking about ruining my shoes or clothing. I wasn't worried about getting caught out after dark or even whether or not I would end up in the rain. Instead, I was in a state of gratitude and awe, as I watched the dark clouds rolling in. The desert smelled like moist dirt and the red cactus spikes stood out in sharp contrast to the green grasses. The wildflowers that were getting ready to pop, bent and swayed in the breeze. The rocks crunched beneath my inappropriate shoes and the cool air filled my lungs. I didn't realize it but I was walking faster and faster, fueled by the joyous feeling of moving in such a state of grace. Before I realized what I was doing, I had become one with the wind itself. My mind was unhurried or unworried, and as the state of ecstatic union with everything overcame me, I realized I was nearly running. Something told me this is what the cheetah feels like when he dashes, or the wolf when he lopes, or the dolphin when she races through the oceans. I felt like pure energy moving amidst fields of energy all around me. The movement was fluid, graceful, and unrushed, even though I realized I was moving very quickly. I felt no fatigue whatsoever, only the ecstatic joy of being part of this beautiful moment. Feeling as if no time had elapsed at all, I realized I had hiked over a mile to a spot where I like to sit and pray, overlooking both the city and the mountains. I stopped, zapped back into normal human reality and realized my lungs were heaving in and out from the exertion that I hadn't even noticed. I sat on my favorite rock and sang God's praises. To my great surprise, although I haven't hiked that far in ages, I woke up the next morning with no soreness or fatigue whatsoever.

When we don't rush, we move faster. When we don't worry about the future, we get farther. When we enjoy the moment, we open up to magical surprises. Life moves more fluidly. It doesn't hurt. It gives way before us rather than rising up against us.

Try it. Try to resist that panic'd sense of urgency in your life. Try to be present in each moment. Try to focus on your own priorities rather than everyone else's. Yes paying your bills on time is your own priority! Getting to work on time is as well if you want a paycheck! But check in often and see if you are truly listening to yourself, or the tugs and pulls around you. Then, watch just how much more you can accomplish when you are in integrity with yourself one moment at a time :)

Have a lovely week - every single 604,800 seconds of it!!!