Friday, September 28, 2007

Heavenly Play

This week but the vibration coming through as I typed the angels' message was delightful, playful, and very uplifting. They have taught me over and over again the value of play. If I take time off to refill my spirit I get SO much accomplished. People always ask me where I get my energy. I work hard, but I also play hard.

Last weekend I went tubing on the salt river with some friends. You sit in these wonderful inner tubes, tie them all together, and float down the river without a care in the world. Other than avoiding being thrown into the banks, there is little you can control and what a wonderful feeling it is to surrender so completely to the beauty of nature. We saw blue herons, red winged blackbirds, and wild horses. We felt the sun on our faces, and the cool water on our backs. And Monday I had so much energy I cleaned house, got my emails caught up, organized my finances AND finished my final revision of a book that I wrote over 11 years ago! When I'm happy, I can share it. When I'm exhausted I'm not much good to anyone.

So try to get a little (or better yet, a lot) of playtime in your life. Think of it as a tune up for your spirit! Far from being selfish, it gives you so much more to give.

Have a joyful week... and try to goof off just a little bit more!

Thursday, September 20, 2007

God always loves us.. you are never stuck

I used to be a people pleaser who always believed I had to earn love. I'd bend over backwards, spend loads of money, and do whatever it took to make The angels have often reminded me that my way of looking at a situation defines my experience. When I choose a loving and grateful way of looking at life, I feel wonderful. When I don't, its like a thick cloud blinds me to the truth of God's love. Every now and then I forget everything I know and feel sorry for myself.

I fell into that last week. I volunteered to help a friend get his website started. He graciously paid me for my work, but I got into 'poor me' mode about the fact that *I* decided to stay up late working on it to help him get it going. He did have a deadline, but I knew he didn't expect me to kill myself to do it. Nonetheless, some old disfunctional pattern kicked in and there I was being unhealthy to help a loved one stay on track. I knew better and did it anyway. God knows what short-circuits in my brain sometimes, but no matter how practiced I am at balance, I can at times fall into insanity. Given my job, it got even more crazy. It always seems that there are forces in the universe trying to throw me off track since I stand in public preaching about God's love.

If I get off balance, and forget to set the rules about who and what is allowed near me in my sleep, I can wake up feeling pretty thrashed. I woke up feeling a real mess last Sunday. What started out as exhaustion, quickly spiralled downhill into feeilng like I existed to serve others and would never have my own dreams come true. Rubbish! Total and complete rubbish! That train of thought lasted all of fifteen minutes before I remembered everything I know once again.

When I saw what I was allowing my mind to do, I sat myself down and immediately began to pray. "God, angels, I've lost my brain. Restore me to truth. Suck out this negativity, and please, while you are at it, I need some energy. Make me fall asleep at a reasonable time and crave food that is good for me. Thank you." And then I sat until the familiar loving vibration came in and held me in its arms. I should say 'their arms' but sometimes the love is so strong it can only be the God-vibration that surrounds me. The vibration of Divine love flowed through me and washed away all my cares and concerns. All I had to do was to remember God's love and ask for it, then sit and receive it like an innocent child waiting for a hug.

God does love us. Most of the time we know that, but at times, we ALL forget. And in those times, its important not to try to get ourselves out of the mess, but rather to sit and pray. Pray for your internal conditions to change rather than praying for the outside world to change. I could have prayed for appreciation, someone to pick up the phone and call me, etc. but what I really needed was a quick change of attitude. Guess what... when the internal conditions change, all of life responds on the outside and all of the sudden life turns around on a dime! Your life starts anew with every single breath. With a sudden change of attitude, come sudden changes in life as well. .

You are never alone. You are never without help. And you are never really stuck in darkness. Its just a little cloud waiting to be burnt away by the light :)

Saturday, September 15, 2007

Love Self & Others equally

I used to be a people pleaser who always believed I had to earn love. I'd bend over backwards, spend loads of money, and do whatever it took to make anyone's dreams come true. And I got bitter and resentful that no one was there to support me. In my thirties I did not see how I was creating my own mess. As I grew and worked with angels, they helped me see that there are times when it is truly joyful to give, and times when I did it out of obligation, need to be needed, or the desire to unconsciously make another spend time with or appreciate me. I was purchasing love and affection.

I started being more honest about what I really wanted to give. I started to pay attention to whether or not I was giving from love and joy, or from lesser reasons. I still have to watch it. I still find it a habit to say yes to every request. Sometimes I do so honestly and other times I catch myself later and question my motives, and learn to go deeper and become more authentic. Its a challenge for those of us who love so much to include ourselves in that love as well, and yet this is the balance we seek here on earth. To love self and other with equal dedication - now that is mastery. I'm still working on it :)

Saturday, September 08, 2007

Living a heart-centered life

For years I struggled to distinguish between my heart and my mind. My dad is a physicist, and my mom a very lively and emotional soul. I was born between Aries and Pieces (head and heart). And every time I take one of those IQ tests, they say my left and right brain are split down the middle. "How do you make decisions," one tester asked me when I was younger. "Not with ease!!" I wanted to reply. Logic used to always argue with my feelings.

Over the years the angels have trained me to use logic to follow the heart, rather than subjugating my heart to my mind. On my day off I REALLY wanted to go hiking with some friends. And yet when I searched my heart, I realized I was exhausted, and needed rest. So even though my mind wanted to have a pity party, push myself to go, and make myself enjoy it, I listened to my heart and my body. As a result I got the rest I needed to be productive this week and I know there will be other opportunities to play in the future.

I use the same principle on more important ventures. Several years ago a wonderful client offered me a nationally syndicated radio show talking to those on the other side. I prayed over it and realized my mind was giving me a thousand reasons to say yes - Wow, look how great it would look on your resume; Look how much you could make; You could market your books... etc. And yet my heart said, "I don't want to sit in a little room every week and talk to people I can't see. I like to hug and touch people and reach out with my energy and look them in the eye." I gracefully declined and a sent them a well-deserving friend who is a natural fit for the show. I have not regretted the decision

Likewise, when I quit engineering, within two days the company called me back and offered me $10,000 for two months worth of contracting. That was SO much compared to what they paid me as a regular employee. I had just quit and rational thought told me I really SHOULD take the money because "it was just two months" and yet my heart was practically screaming at me... "You quit to study spirituality!!! No way." Again, I declined, not knowing where my future income would come from, but knowing my heart would wither if I were to ignore it any longer.

So many times I have listened to my heart against the advice of others, against the barrage of logic, and my inner critic, and against all reason. Some times I have walked straight into difficult lessons I needed in order to grow further, and more often I have walked into greater joy. Its a different way to live than the way in which I was raised, and yet I would't trade it for the world.

What if we all led heart centered lives? I believe our communications would be more honest and so would our lives. Try it a bit this week, or if you already are living this way try to fine tune your ability to listen to the heart on even the smallest details - like what you want for dinner. This is amazing grace in action.

Saturday, September 01, 2007

God wins!

It has been an interesting week. I have never seen anything like it in all my years of doing readings. My best friend's house that they just put on the market was vandalized by crazed and drunken neighbors, and so many clients have written me with similar stories of discouragement and attack, whethere it be by uptight co-workers with bad behavior, former spouses flying off the handle, you name it. I was joking with a client that I think God is doing so well, that Satan took viagra. It was unreal. I think that's why I went through my little deal with the angry person a few weeks back - so I could be calm for everyone else this week.

No matter what... God wins. Always and forever, love wins.

We are all being challenged to stay in a loving space these days and yet it is the only space in which we come out 'winners' because to fall out of love is to lose ourselves to the very challenges that plague us. It is not easy. It takes extreme self discipline not to fall into hatred and anger towards those who aim their anger and pain at us. It takes prayer... "God help me forgive. Help me love. Help heal their hurting hearts." It takes courage. It is the easy way out to get sucked into the dramas and fears and angers of this world. That dance is supported by the masses. If someone calls you a name most of your friends would rush to your side to defend you. And yet, in my crowd of friends, we do something different. We may vent a little but we soon get over it and we start praying for the attackers. We pray for our own ability to rise above it and love as God loves. We pray for the ability not to give our thoughts to the darkness and to forgive. And God answers those prayers, keeps us safe, helps use heal any messes that those lost in darkness have made, and prevails.

Forgiveness is never saying something was 'ok' - forgiveness says, I give your actions in my past no power over the goodness in my future. Forgiveness frees you up - it has little to do with the other.

There is no greater power in the world than God's love, than an open heart willing to show compassion to the lost and wounded souls, and at the same time do the right thing and take care of yourselves. My friends, did of course, file a police report and get an injunction against the vandals. They chose not to respond to their attacks. And I chose to go with my friend, late at night after we both got off work to check on the house, not with fear in my heart but with prayers on my lips. All was well. All was peaceful. All was calm.

We are being asked to live according to higher standards than the rest of the world, and we CAN do it. Angels are helping us. And by freeing up our energy to love, rather than to fall into deep anger, fear, and hatred (although we may momentarily have those feelings move through us since we can't escape being human), our energy is availble to create the good we want in our lives instead. When our loving energy is abundant, and we open up to more in our lives, because choosing love always opens us up to the River of God flowing through us. Think of your energy like your money - invest it in thoughts that uplift you, people that inspire you, with withdraw it from those who wish to bring you down.

It 's not easy, but its right.

You are strong and God and the angels are always behind you. And at times in our lives when faced with negativity and fearful souls, remember what the psalmist said... "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for [God] you are with me." I truly believe this.