Thursday, April 19, 2007

A visit to Karunamayi

It has been an amazing week. Every year I go to Sedona to see Karunamayi, an Indian woman who is known as the 'embodiment of the Divine Mother." She fasted and prayed in the jungles and caves in her native India for ten years and basically connected so strongly with God she radiates the healing divine energy of the female side of God. She heals, does miracles, blessings, etc. (www.karunamayi.org). Every year I go ask for some blessing. This year I trust that God is handling the outer details of my life so all my blessing requests were internal... Cure the fure I feel about going out bigger in the world. Help me heal the sadness I feel as I witness the world's pain and the number of people who complain when they are truly blessed. Help me stop being hard on myself. Help me heal the physical pain that occurs when I slide into these conditions.

She touched my forehead, and I felt the soothing balm of God's love pouring through me. I was in bliss. Later that night I was sobbing like an infant and my body was in wracking pain as I allowed the fears, and sorrows to surface in order to leave my system. The physical pain got so bad in the middle of the night I got up and sat with God. "Ok God," I said. "I know you are in this pain. Reveal yourself to me." I searched through my body with awareness, paying attention to the feelings in each spot, and knew as I focused on each one what it was about. I prayed to have the illusions released and in that prayer, one by one they were. I called in the angels and told them that I knew what this was about but needed to feel their love and comfort NOW. The warmth spread throughout me as I completed my spiritual homework, and I slept peacefully. I used all my own healing techniques, had several friends join in, took one advil later that day and was done with the pain, done with some serious old fears about even being a loving soul on this earth, and done with the sadnesses for at least the time being. I felt renewed in body, mind, and spirit.

You may ask what this has to do with manifesting. I am always manifesting more joy, more of a life kissed by grace and ease, and more spiritual freedom. Those mean more to me than any material possession. The stuff comes when I need it but these are the eternal qualities that I will take with me after this life and the qualities that make my life worth living. So if I want more joy, I have to let go of more sorrow. If I want more freedom, I must release more fear.

When you feel fearful or in pain - physically and emotionally - embrace it, go within and see what it is about. It is not fun, I'll vouch for that!! But if you do the homework, the clouds lift quickly. Don't try to analyze the pain with your mind. Sink deep into it with your heart and a prayer for understanding. Search your heart for when you may have felt that in your past. Pray for healing. As you embrace it emotionally with the light of your consciousness and your love - and your willingness to see it as teacher, it will pass far more quickly. And the freedom that follows is bliss. I now know that when something this difficult arises, there are big freedoms on the other side of it, bigger bliss, capacity to receive more, and more love to give.

Don't be afraid of the darker spaces in your life or your world. They teach you if you are willing to face them with a prayer and with courage, and you will always come out more spiritually free and powerful. The world is not an adverse place unless you choose to see it that way. Love can be found in all situations. It is not easy, but it is SO worthwhile to view life this way.

Love and prayers,
Ann

ps - our prayers go to all who were affected by the shootings in Virginia this week. The angels say this is time to pray for a healing of the vibration that creates such pain that a soul would resort to such violence. They ask us not to judge but rather to admit that many of us have felt such desperate pain inside of ourselves at times, that while we wouldn't resort to violence on others, we have at times, shared angry words, violent judgements against ourselves, or wished ill towards others. They don't want us to point fingers - to say us vs. them, but rather to acknowledge the collective human pain and know that we can play a part in stopping violence on this planet when we choose to be kinder to ourselves and as a natural consequence, kinder towards others as well.

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